Jasoua:

I have to say to you !!!CONGRADULATIONS!!! on the coming birth of your child. No, I'm not disappointed in you not writing back, I understand. Your husband must be very proud of you. I wish for you and your husband that you both have a healthy and wonderful child who will be a jewel for the both of you. Give your child all the love that you can possibly give everyday. You will be richly rewarded. Take care Jasoua and may you have a beautiful child. ~ Roberto

By Hectorvelasquez (63.169.132.219) on Monday, March 5, 2001 - 02:17 pm:

Jasoua, I actually I should have said something myself. I have a habit of going from one topic to another and not finishing the one I started on. I actually have topics that I started months ago that I should probably finish.

Congratulations on your motherhood. I know you and your husband are happy about that.

The reason I asked about blacks attaining high-positions in Germany is because I, like Roberto, have heard that many Germans feel Germany should stay German, Germany for Germans, ect. The idea of a foreigner reaching a high position would seem to not go over well with those people. For example I could hardly imagine a black man reaching a really high position in the UK.

Of course I have also heard that your family could have lived in Germany for 3 generations and still not be "German." Being German is defined by blood so to speak. Would you say this is true? In America some people, both blacks and whites, don't think of blacks as being "true Americans," whatever that means, even though most blacks have lived here longer (not under the best of circumstances) than many if not most whites; since European immigration picked up at the turn of the 20th century.

While we're on the subject, what do some of the German women you talk to think of African American men? I probably don't want to know the answer to this though.

By Jasoua (62.54.192.239) on Monday, March 5, 2001 - 09:24 am:

To Roberto and hectorvelasquez:

Hi, I hope the two of you are not disappointed that I didn't post any message in the last two weeks, but I'm happy to say, that I was very busy at my work and my doctor confirmed last week to me, that I'm pregnant.
That means in September me and my husband will be parents.

~Jasoua

By Jasoua (62.54.195.177) on Thursday, February 15, 2001 - 04:19 am:

To Hectorvelasquez:

You asked a tough question.

I’m not sure if it is necessary to be a German citizen when you want to become a mayor.
I know you can’t become a minister, secretary of state or chancellor of Germany when you’re not a German, but I know there are some Turkish people in the parliament.
Turkish who were raised in Germany.
And yes it’s true, only because you were born in Germany doesn’t permit you to receive the German citizenship.
Since last year it is possible for a child that is born in Germany to receive the German citizenship, but only if the parents of the child are holding a regular residence permission.
The child will have the German citizenship and the citizenship of the parents and will have to make a final decision for one of it when it is 23, because the German law permit double citizenship only in a few cases.
It is not easy to become the German citizenship, but it is not impossible.
An alien who is married to a German citizen can get the German citizenship after 2 years marriage and 3 years regular residence permission in Germany.
An alien who isn’t married to a German citizen can receive the German citizenship after 8 years regular residence permission in Germany.
In both of the cases the German citizenship will be given when the alien will cancel his former citizenship, but there are exclusions.
Some countries will not release there citizens, so you only have to prove that you tried to get released and people who were accepted to receive asylum don’t have to ask for release of their citizenship and in both cases they would be allowed to hold two citizenship.
I don’t think that it is easy for a black man, especially an African to rise to a higher position in a German company, but I think it will be easier for the black children who are in German schools now. I think in 10 years there will be many black people in high positions in this country.
But Africans have stores, travel agencies, afro shops, etc.
For Turks is more common to rise in higher positions, but you have to know, they’re already in their 3. generation here in Germany.

~ Jasoua

By Roberto (205.188.198.36) on Tuesday, February 13, 2001 - 09:33 pm:

Jasoua:

First let me say, you have a beautiful country in Germany. I spent twelve great years there in the United States Air Force. I miss the beer, the food and the castles. I hope to go to the Oktoberfest in Munich (or Munchin) this fall, if my job permit it. Hamburg is a beautiful city. I love the night life there.

(1) I understand the growing rightist movement that has sprung out of what use to be East Germany. I arrived in your country back in 1985 when it was West Germany. I saw all the changes, even the Fall of the Berlin Wall. I saw for myself in the later years (1993 to 1998) the changes in the attitudes on some Germans who were from the East who resented foreigners. But I enjoyed Germany and have many German friends there. I miss it.

(2) "I'm not attracted to black men generally, but to my own husband", I admire your outlook. You demonstrate the same respect that I have found from german women, a devotion and loyalty to your men. I respect that. You are right, despite your country's history, I have found the German people in general, very open to interracial couples.

(3) What that child of the interracial couple that sponsored you as a host experience is the poison that has infected this country, and that is ignorance. I sometimes wonder how we as a country can live with ourselves preaching to the rest of the world that we have the ideal values in human relations, but violate it in our own relations to others right here.

Thank you Jasoua for your responses. i would like to in the future ask of you other subject matters that concern how you enjoy being in American and what are some things here you enjoy and what you miss from Germany. Weidersehen. ~ Roberto

By Hectorvelasquez (204.248.132.133) on Tuesday, February 13, 2001 - 12:33 pm:

Jasoua would you say that it is possible, or how possible it is, for a black or man of African descent who has been living in Germay for some time to do something like say run for mayor of a city or a representative in the federal government? I suppose that something like this isn't even possible because I've heard that it is possible to be born in Germany, but not receive German citizenship. Also I don't know how easy this is for a native German who is not well connected. Is it possible for a black or African man to rise to a high level in German company? Is it possible for a Turk to do something like this?

By Jasoua (62.54.193.214) on Tuesday, February 13, 2001 - 01:44 am:

To Roberto:

No, it’s not to many questions and I’m pleased to answer them as far as my poor English permit.


(1) Do you think Europeans in general, and Germans specifically, have a better understanding of cross cultural and interracial relationships due to their long involvement with the Third world and the multi-ethnic groups in Europe than Americans?

Not everything in Germany is perfect. We still have stupid people who believe that Germany is only for Germans. I hear about it in news and it shocks me, but I’m staying in Hamburg and I never experienced any discrimination because of my cross cultural and interracial marriage.
I think most of the Germans (not all) have a better understanding of cross cultural and interracial relationships because of the crimes that happened during World War II and the Nazi Regime. I think I was 12 years old when I watched the first film in school about what Hitler and his followers did to the European Jews. I thank God that my family was never involved in any of that crimes.
Germany doesn’t have a law of immigration, that means most of the black people who are staying in Germany are seeking for Asylum and in most of the cases their request of political asylum is rejected, so the only chance for a B/W relationship to continue is to marry, because than the law says that any foreigner who is married to a German citizen is supposed to get a staying permit.


(2) As a German woman, what attracts you to black men? Does the history of black servicemen in Germany have an impact on how German women and men see them as compared to the movies as they were depicted in from Hollywood?

I’m not attracted to black men in generally, but to my own husband.
I was having two relationships before I met him.
My first boyfriend was a German and so was the second.
I really loved my second boyfriend. ( He was blonde, blue-eyed and 1,98 m height)
The only B/W relationship I had and have is the one with my husband.
We started dating in 1993 and married in 1997.
There are many things that attract him to me, but there is nothing in particular that attract him to me only because he’s black, to be honest most of the time I don’t even notice the difference of our colors.

(3) Did you meet your current husband in Germany or in the United States? If you met him in Germany, was it easier or difficult there to be accepted interracially. If it was here in the United States, did you find it more difficult or was it easier than in Germany?

I met my husband in Germany. I was on my way to visit my grandparents and my husband saw me and talked to me and asked for a date.
I refused, but anytime he met me later he asked again for a date, so the third time I agreed and never regret.
( I didn’t refuse because he’s black, I refused because it was just 2 months ago that I broke up with my former boyfriend and I wasn’t interested to date anybody.)
I was staying in the United States for one year when I was 16 years old for a students exchange and my host family was an B/W couple with two children.
I remember that one time the son came home from school and was disturbed because one of his schoolmates asked him if his father is sick because he’s married to a white woman and that the father would betray his own race.
My husband and I never experienced such thing.
But maybe it is because my husband is an African and most of the black people we know are Africans. There are more African men in Germany then African women so it’s only natural that many African men marry white German women.
So I think it is easier in Germany to be accepted as an interracial couple.


Jasoua

By Roberto (205.188.193.159) on Monday, February 12, 2001 - 08:26 pm:

Jasoua:

I respect your request not to answer questions that you feel uncomfortable about. Basically I would like to hear from you on are your feelings on the following:

(1) Do you think Europeans in general, and Germans specifically, have a better understanding of cross cultural and interracial relationships due to their long involvement with the Third world and the multi-ethnic groups in Europe than Americans?

(2) As a German woman, what attracts you to black men? Does the history of black servicemen in Germany have an impact on how German women and men see them as compared to the movies as they were depicted in from Hollywood?

(3) Did you meet your current husband in Germany or in the United States? If you met him in Germany, was it easier or difficult there to be accepted interracially. If it was here in the United States, did you find it more difficult or was it easier than in Germany?

Jasoua, I'm sorry if I ask too many questions of you, but you are an interesting woman from a different perspective that we can all learn from here on interracial dating and marriage between white women and black men. ~ Roberto

By Hectorvelasquez (65.160.183.224) on Monday, February 12, 2001 - 11:58 am:

To Jasoua:

If you don't mind staying I'd like to hear the answers to Roberto's questions too. I've traveled in Europe some, but I didn't quite make it to Germany.

By Jasoua (62.54.195.177) on Monday, February 12, 2001 - 07:48 am:

To Roberto:

Just ask me. When I think I don't want to answer then I will tell you.

Wiedersehen
Jasoua

jasoua@yahoo.de

By Roberto (152.163.204.63) on Friday, February 9, 2001 - 12:48 pm:

Welcome Jasoua:

This is great! To have someone like yourself, a German woman involved is a interracial relationship. There are perhaps a hundred questions that I would like to ask of you, but all in due time. Not much time for me here. But I want to say this. To understand this country's attitude toward interracial sex and marriage, you have to understand its history. There is no easy or superficial way around it. Glad to have your here. ~ Wiedersehen Roberto

By Jasoua (62.54.194.52) on Friday, February 9, 2001 - 11:09 am:

I cannot understand the problems you American people create for yourself about interracial relationships.
Where exactly is the problem?
The only difference between a white and a black person is the color of the skin.
I for example are a German female and married since 1997 to my husband who is an African.
My husband and I are from different cultures, different countries, different religions, etc.
Most of this problems are not existing in the cases of the B/W relationships in the US.

Regards
Jasoua

By Anon2000 (207.218.73.7) on Tuesday, February 6, 2001 - 10:33 pm:

no this is not the appropriate place to post your story! good grief, take it to a XXX site, not here! we're having serious convos here, woman!

By Margaretl (12.77.8.4) on Tuesday, February 6, 2001 - 09:46 am:

Maximus
You seem to have touched on a nerve with some people. There are all sorts of relationships between people, and you address one of the more puzzling. It is well documented that Native American Tribes invited the lone Black man on the Lewis and Clark expedition to have sex with their wives. I think some of the interest may come from an innate knowledge of the value of genetic diversity and hybrid vigor. Some of the interest comes from the husbands. I think another aspect maybe similar to the vicarious thrill they get from watching athletes. Sometimes they like watching a job well done. Personally, I like a good romp, but I would never exclude my husband from my sex life, or do anything behind his back. I don't know if this is the appropriate place to write it, but do you want to here my story?