It was when I was out there trying to survive just like everybody else out there that I met and married my life saver. Although, it/we did not stand the test of time as a married couple. We are still friends. On his birthday, i still go to his place of employement and sing "Happy Birthday...." and lay my head on his shoulder. We have been through hell and back. He is remarried now and I would never tempt him to cheat on his present wife; although she is a real bitch. However, that is neither here nor there. The main thing is: we will always love each other: one boy and one girl. We had kids. One passed away and one is living with a monster. I hope that one day soon, there will be deliverance!!!

By Anon2000 (207.218.73.130) on Friday, April 27, 2001 - 01:04 pm:

let me put it this way, roberto, i'm speaking strictly for myself. the curiosity thing may have been part of MY motivation when i first started dating ir, but there are lots of ww who wouldn't dare step out of the box. it sure wasn't because i couldn't find a wm! it was my CHOICE, and is now my PREFERENCE.

By Roberto (152.163.205.72) on Thursday, April 26, 2001 - 10:25 pm:

Anon2000:

Do many white women live a boring monocultural lifestyle? Does this explains the desire of many white women to seek out new experiences in men, and cultures that excite their curiosity? ~ Roberto

By Anon2000 (207.218.73.123) on Thursday, April 26, 2001 - 09:57 pm:

roberto,
yes....but when you're the partner of a militant bm, it's a bad feeling when you finally discover that your man doesn't really give a damn about YOU, but for your whiteness. it's a huge insult! if a woman doesn't gain a backbone after an encounter (or two) with a man like this, it's doubtful she ever will!

i know of a ww married to a jamaican dread who worships his dirty drawers. they have a lot of children and she wants even more, forget the fact that she's in her 40's. he does not work - she does - full time. he is a total loser, sleazy and is ALWAYS running around and flagrantly dogging her. he's made her ill and worse. she will NEVER leave him. it really saddens me...but this is HER MAN.

melirosa,
you have it much easier, i feel. what rich cultural experiences you must have had growing up as opposed to the boring monocultural lifestyle may ww are accustomed to! i'm sure it wasn't all peaches and cream tho...you shared the caribbean culture (you are p.r.?) what is the most difficult adjustment you have had to make in terms of your relationship with your man?

i agree, though, the differences can make an ir extra spicy!*smile*

By Roberto (205.188.195.41) on Thursday, April 26, 2001 - 09:37 pm:

Mad Scientist:

Some black revolutionaries of earlier times did use their intimate sexual relations with white women as a means to get back at "the man" for the thousands of lynchings of black men over white women. It was kicking sand in the eyes of "the man" to say "you have taken our women in the past, now its our turn to take take your women". It was an interracial sexual vendetta. ~ Roberto

By Mad_scientist (134.124.212.217) on Thursday, April 26, 2001 - 09:27 pm:

Read Eldridge Cleaver's Soul On Ice, and maybe you can get a little bit of insight into this. Many of them claimed that they were getting revenge on the white man by doing this.

By Roberto (152.163.195.209) on Thursday, April 26, 2001 - 08:14 pm:

modulus:

I see some things have not change. I mentioned in an earlier post that many black nationalists in the 1960's and 70's had white girlfriends and wives. For me, at the time it was quite a contradiction by these so-called revolutionaries to say they had a "war against the white man", but was willing to sleep with and marry his enemies women.

What attracted white women to these black men? It was admiration for them as "underdogs" against a power they had no chance of winning against. It was their love for men willing in some cases to give up their lives. Call it "loving the martyr". ~ Roberto

By Melirosa (208.48.12.163) on Thursday, April 26, 2001 - 09:44 am:

anon2000-
my fiancee is jamaican. though he is not a dread and he is lighter skinned, he was born in brooklyn and raised in west kingston, jamaica. i know what you mean about making the leap. i am from the bronx, so maybe my leap didn't require as much effort as some of the middle class ww that you know, but it is still quite different, and sometimes the relationship requires a little "extra attention". i have to say that it certainly makes it interesting though.

By Melirosa (208.48.12.163) on Thursday, April 26, 2001 - 09:44 am:

anon2000-
my fiancee is jamaican. though he is not a dread and he is lighter skinned, he was born in brooklyn and raised in west kingston, jamaica. i know what you mean about making the leap. i am from the bronx, so maybe my leap didn't require as much effort as some of the middle class ww that you know, but it is still quite different, and sometimes the relationship requires a little "extra attention". i have to say that it certainly makes it interesting though.

By Anon2000 (207.218.73.116) on Thursday, April 26, 2001 - 01:02 am:

some white women do...some. my ex husband was very afrocentric, dreads, african clothing, etc., but there are just as many ww who prefer a bm in an armani suit, clean cut. i prefer a dark skin bm with dreads and a beard, so that drastically reduces the pool of men to choose from. well, unless you're planning a trip to jamaica, lol!

the crowd i run with (the ww) prefer jamaican dreads. maybe it's the whole "other" thing that is appealing, yunno, opposites attract. however, this may be true physically, but emotionally it's a BIIIIG leap from a middle class ww to a jamaican bm raised in a tenament yard. many can't make the leap...on both sides.

By Mad_scientist (134.124.212.217) on Thursday, April 26, 2001 - 12:41 am:

Strangely, I knew such a person. He is an African drummer with dreads, but has a white wife.

By Modulis (216.249.77.217) on Wednesday, April 25, 2001 - 11:04 pm:

I don't know, is there some chemistry between afrocentric black men and white women? I read somewhere in here that it was known that a lot of panthers were seeing white women on the side. Today at school, I went to an art exhibition. This real darkskin African-looking Afrocentric brotha was showcasing his sculptures and telling about how slavery, Africa, black struggle and everything influenced his work. I walked away thinking he was a black nationalist. But low and behold, his girlfriend comes in and she's this cute blonde girl. I was thinking that that sort of confirms the stereotype. I've heard of this thing time and time again, where this Afrocentric brotha will have a white woman. Is there some kind of chemistry between the two? Do white women have some sort of fascination with such black men? Do they consider it a challenge to get an afrocentric black man to love them? Inquiring minds wanna know!