Biblical Concubines

The Bible is full of examples of plural marriage and concubinage. And in these cases, God never rebuked them nor do scriptures tell us it was a sin.

So, how do we come to the conclusion today that God intended marriage to be one man and one woman? Besides isnt God the same today, yesterday and always? So I cannot understand why he would suddenly change his mind as to the religious legality of having more than one wife.

Do you guys think that the people who wrote or interpreted the scriptures were influenced by their cultural beliefs and practices? Or did God really redefine marriage?

 

In Islam, it is permitted to have more than one wife (as long as the husband can take care of them) I cant see anything wrong with this, as long as everybody is happy. A lot of European women are interested in Islam, so I guess its not a stumbling block for them either.
I dont see that it could be wrong from a religious point of view.

 

Whoa...tis is a GREAAAT topic...
My dad had four wives at one point (he is 73 years old now, and married to a woman that is 38!!!)...and he is an elder in a presbyterian church!!

But anyway, the question is great and in my opinion, the whole "one man one woman" is totally a social construct, something we (human beings) thought would make the society work better, keep ppl in check, make sure they do not have too much freedom...bcoz a real free man is dangerous for the powers in place in all societies...and what better area to "tame a man ( or a woman) than to control his/her sex/marriage life???

God had nothing to do with the whole one man/one woman thing...King David who is considered one of the Goldliest man in the Bible, had many, many wives...including one he stole from one of his soldiers who later gave him a son...King Solomon, also considered a man of God!! who also had a plethora of women...

And all of a sudden, after Jesus' departure, when the apostles started the "church system" and had to control their disciples, they introduced all sort of rules about the marriage and everything...and now ppl just believe in it as if it was God's own word!!
It's nothing but a control system, and it has been here for so long now that we feel it's natural...but is it??

 

May I just ask where that is?

I'm asking because I thought you where from Cameroon (don't know why), and so's my BF. And he's christian too, and so is his family, and they haven't practiced polygamy for several generations.

I though Christians where not allowed to have many wifes, because God created Adam and Eve (not Adam and Eve and Ann and May and +++), hence it's implied that there should be one man and one woman.

 

I am very glad you answered. I believe like you do.

I find studying the holy books interesting. Many things that we believe are in there, aren't.

 

Hey Ronja...
You thought I was from Cameroon and you don't know why? well, I am from Cameroon and you probably read it somewhere on this site! You are asking where PRESBYTERIAN is (I guess)??? Presbyterian is just a branch of the Protestant church, like Baptist, or Lutheran...

You are right, Christians haven't practiced polygamy in Africa for a long time...remember, I mentioned the fact that my father is 73 years old..(not exactly in his 20s or 30s huh? )

BUT, is God changing Ronja? bcoz even though he created only Adam and Eve (at least according to the Bible), he didn't have any problem with David or Solomon or Jacob having not only more than one wife, but more than 50 or 100 wives...

Also don't you believe that if he had created many wives from Adam right away, Adam wouldn't have had a whole lot of flesh left on him?

Ok, joking aside, I really believe the whole monogamy thing came with the disciples of Christ in their concern about the disciplin of their followers, and after centuries of being told monogamy is the way to go, of course we ALL (or almost) believe we were created to be ONE with ONE...

The whole society is now based on that tradition and living differently in this society sure is a hard thing to do...but it doesn't mean at all that it is our nature!!

Peace!!

 

You are absolutely right Fly Girl...and interestingly also, many things we believe aren't in the holy books are in them, between the lines!!

 

My BF is a catholic, and so is his whole family. Even his grandparents have always practiced monogamy. To be completely honnest I got a little nervous when I read about your father at first...one generation is what I would consider a short time ago Even had to call my BF to get reasured that he'd never get an idea like that, since we've talked about moving to Camreoon in a few years. (Don't wanna end up as just one in a huge harem )

I did a little bit of asking around this easter (was on vacation), since I don't really know the bible. But most mentoned a quote in the new testament where it's said that in marriage "the two shall be one" or something like that, as an explanation to why christians practice monogamy(mostly) . Also, I and noone else, could think of any examples of polygamy from the new testament...

 

Dear Ronja...
Of course you won't find any exemple of monogamy in the new testament...like I said, the whole monogamy concept was brought in by Jesus' disciples, who wrote the new testament...

But the Bible is New and Old testamen isn't it? and if God is the same, you should then be kinda surprised that he didn't have a problem with monogamy in the old testament time shouldn't you??

Please don't freak out, like I said, polygamy hasn't been practiced in Africa for along time now...
No, men have become much smarter now, they pretend they believe in the Church and monogamy and all, and instead of having many wives, they have the "principal wife" (you) and then the mistresses on the side!! (you know, the ones that aren't too annoying, won't ask too many questions, won't cost as much but will do a whoooole lot of kinky stuff???) Heheheheheee!!!

 

This is how I, and most other christians I know (including my BF) sees it:

The bible is the old and the new testament, that's true. But the new testament is A LOT more important than the old one. This is not only because it speaks of Christ, but also because it brings the message that God is forgiving and loving (instead of revengefull and fearsome). Also the old testament was given to the Israelis, while the new testament was given to the whole of mankind. That's also one of the reasons Christians can do things jews can't. The old testament tells the story of Israel, and the laws aplies to the Israelis, allthough they can of course be a good guidline to christians as well. The laws of the old testament, don't have to be taken litterally by christians though (for instance we're allowed to mix milk and meat, eat pork, work on fridays etc etc).

Anyway, Jesus himself (not just the deciples) have repetedly said (for instance in Matthew 19.3) that "a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." His wife, not his wifeS. And the number is two, not 4 or 36, only two! Just because something might not specifically forbidden, does not necciserely mean that's what Jesus intended.

Just for the record. I'm fine with polygamy... whatever makes people happy... but I'm surprised that it's possible to be Christan and practice polygamy.

I hope you're being Ironic.

First:
Polygamy is very much alive in Africa. How long since you where last there? According to "Africa have your say" almost 40% of marriages in Cameroon are polygamous. I was under the impression that were the muslim part of the population though. I can also mention that I was in Swaziland this winter, and I can asure you, that even in southern Africa, polygamy is very much alive and kicking. (I asumed that was because traditional believes are so strong in Swaziland though.)

Second: You talk like polygamy is a "vaccine" against infidelity. That's not true at all. If anything it increases infidelity. Men who are allowed to have multiple wifes, are naturally also alowed to go out and "hunt" for those wifes. Meaning they'll be allowed to continue to go out and flirt every chance they get. And from flirting, there's really not a long way to the bed. Sorry to say it, don't mean to sound racist (God knows I'm not) but this is the truth: If polygamy was a vaccine against infidelity, Africa would have far less HIV and STDs that they got.

Third:

Wow. I'm glad I have a more positive view on men than you got! I really think it's possible for men, also Cameroonian men, to be faithfull! If you truely love someone, that person should be enough for you, and you wouldn't want to hurt the other person by going behind his/her back, don't you agree? If so, the trick is not to fall out of love. Which is pretty much the trick for anyone regardless of colour and culture...

---
Regards
"Ronja"

 

Hey Ronja...
I see that you "know your Africa!!"

I knew that polygamy was still practiced mostly by Muslims in Africa, I should probably have specified that...as you (probably) know, Cameroon has about 30% I believe of muslims (in the north of the country)

Ok, now the debate about polygamy being a vaccine against infidelity, I really didn't mean to say it was...I was mostly being sarcastic...but my real opinion on that is that neither polygamy nor monogamy help make ppl more or less faithful.
The whole faithful thing, one man one woman thing, according to me is social construct! We either agree with it, find it all the qualities, or we think it's crap and we should all be hedonists!!

I personally believe that faithfulness should be something we naturally feel towards one particular person, not a rule...some ppl don't cheat bcoz they don't want to go behind the back of their partner, but that's still all they dream about...I find it stupid! they shouldn't have been in a commited relationship to start, or they should have an agreement with their partner.

Now about the whole religious thing, we could go forever, about how the disciples reported the words of Christ, and especially the ones they "preferred", etc...and now ppl look at only a part of the picture and decide that the Bible is the WHOLE truth...which I believe is a mistake...but hey, I respect your faith and beliefs if they guide you through this crazy life!!!



Regards...hmmm...very distingue, I like that!!!