50% of wives say husband isn't their best sex partner; 60% of wives would rather read

I've met others, and many of us get pretty tactical when faking. I rarely ever did that. I can orgasm from masturbation, but that is it. I generally inform my partner of that before hand. I have a few theories as to why I don't orgasm from sex, but it isn't really very relevant. I don't and I am more than cool with it. I love my projects and my free time.

 

It's good that you're honest about it with your partner. :smt023

 

I'd be really surprised about this too but it reminds me of that other article/thread where they were talking about how they want it to be quick and over with. It was a younger crowd, I think they were late 20's to mid 30s. They were talking about working long hours, kids, etc. During that phase of life when you are grinding hard to try to get ahead and have little ones keeping you up most of the night many people's sex lives suffer.

Communication is key, but lets be real, many people don't have good communication/problem solving skills in the relationship to start with so when things get strained they aren't going to be any better. If anything, it gets worse. How many people really talk about sex? Women often (especially when younger) want/expect a man to just know what to do for them. They may not even have a clue as to what they really want anyway. Then things change with having children and such and they may not know what they really want or need. Also, many people do things to get into a relationship and don't continue doing them to keep the relationship going too.

I feel bad for both people.

 

Interesting. I think this is a really good point. I've always said that if women have intense orgasms they will go for it every time, just like a man will. If not, I would imagine they really aren't going to be that interested in sex.

 

Good points.

 

There's times I can hold a boner for hours and dont

 

The other problem is the expectations of what a marriage is vs the reality

 

It isn't a boner problem, it's a being able to nut problem.

 

That's basically what I'm saying. I could hold it and it would never happen. I think it's more of a mental thing than a physical. IMO.

 

Funny enough I break it up. One girl stands out as bed head ever another stands out as best vagina ever another best hand job another prettiest vagina to look at.
Truthfully at this point sex is cool but I'm far more happy with someone who is a good supportive partner and doesn't bring unneeded grief into my life. That's sexy as fuck to me and guarantees that woman at least an orgasm a day while she's dating me.
As long as there's porn I'm good lol

 

I'm with you. I tell women (my sistas) men ,black or white , want team players.

I dated a woman who was average looking at best and wanted to marry her and the longer we dated the sex got better. Afterwards, I was nutting all over the place.



Have you ever noticed that the bat shit crazy women had the best feeling pussy

 

Hell yeah it's like a rule or something lol

 

OK. I thought it was just me. Lol.

I've learned that you can turn a woman out and keep her if you can lay that one right but most of turning her is outside the bedroom .....it's more of giving her those eargasims.

 

Can't hold a decent conversation for a couple of seconds but expect ladies to believe you can hold a boner for hours

 

funny enough yesterday I was at a get together with 3 other women and the conversation turned to relationships and sex. 3 of us are older, 1 a bit younger with kids 3-11 years old. It was really interesting to hear how different the women were in terms of what they were wanting and needing in their relationships and it was definitely connected to the point of life they are at. The one who still has a very little one was talking about how it's such a turn on if her husband takes the trash and cleans up sometimes and gives her a break with the kids. She'd love to have a good night sleep. The rest of us aren't there anymore, we need different things.

Overall the biggest thing was communication though. They started on the whole male bashing thing and I turned it around to wait a minute....are you really asking for what you want and need? better yet do you even know what those things are? How can someone meet your needs if you don't even know what those are. Of course they are going to change over time.

We meet people early in life and "fall in love" (whatever that means) and expect them to be our everything for the next 50-80 years but how many even know what it is they want/need? so how can they know that this person is even capable?

As with most things in life, I think it starts with defining what it actually means to you.

I don't expect the best sex ever in a relationship (again depending on what we mean by that) I do need sexual compatibility though which comes with communication. The interesting thing about that is that for me, when you have sexual compatibility, communicate well, and are able to connect with each other on different levels, it becomes the best sex ever.

 

Humans make everything harder than it is. Lol

If they want a man to communicate maybe they should simply become his best friend. Lol. I know, that's too reasonable. Maybe they should keep expecting a man to be their everything and make it his responsibility to figure out what that means, because that's working so well for this society.

I don't think you can be "everything" to a child. They need cousins and friends to balance their simple life yet we are supposed to be "everything" to another adult? LMAO

 

Yep you're right. I got into that with the ladies too. Their expectations are out of line. The one complaining the most said her husband said she's his best friend but she doesn't feel like he's a best friend to her. That's a problem right there.

I've known men who really don't want to be best friends with the woman in their life though. They have said that's not good for a relationship. I think they are wrong. I think though when they are saying that they are more talking about the whole thing of expecting the other person to be everything to you. I don't expect my best gf to be everything for me. I don't expect (or even want) any person to be everything for me. But I will always have my best girlfriend even if I'm in a relationship with a man and he's my best friend. It's a different friendship/relationship. I think you have to have the strong friendship and foundation though. Sex comes and goes, things are hot sometimes and not others. Many things will happen and change in life. Basing a marriage solely on hot sex is not the best idea.

 

If listening to gossip is what a best friend is supposed to do then no. We don't care about gossip unless it is funny, and most women are not funny so we don't expect them to make us laugh often. That's why everyone should have a well balanced life with friends outside of the relationship. I'm sure there are plenty of women who would like to hear her gossip and that's wonderful, so why must the man hear it? Especially if they are willing to listen to almost anything else. The nature of women being nosey is a good thing, we just don't always need a report of the findings.

Our society is so broken that when men hear the term best friend and woman in the same sentence they think their quiet time is over.

 

Interesting.

I don't have any time for the gossip shit. That's not my idea of a best friend...hell not even a friend. My best friend is someone I can count on in the best and worst of times. If she wants to gossip she can do so to her man lol.

Men aren't the only ones who want (and need) quiet and space.

But I know I'm weird too. I don't do the wanting to call/text all day every day...have to know every little detail of their day and tell them every thought I have. That sort of thing irritates the F out of me.

And excuse me but some of us are very funny!!

I think a lot of people confuse the idea of "best" with "only" It's not the same.

 

Yes and I think women tend to do so even more...especially when it comes to men. That was part of that conversation too. Men will even tell us they are very simple and will be really clear about what they want, yet many/most women aren't going to listen to it and are convinced it's much more complicated. Of course there is just no way it could be that simple.

The funny thing about it all is that after enough time women will convince men. Then you find older men who have succumbed to it all and the women are complaining about how the men are now doing all those things the women were doing.