Submit to your Man ?

Discussion in 'Conversations Between White Women and Black Men' started by goodlove, Jul 16, 2010.

  1. goodlove

    goodlove New Member

    are you kidding me ? honestly .

    a basketball team has a pt gaurd he dishes to the power forward and he dunks it. the TEAM scores because of the assist AND the dunk. Not to mention the possible pick that was set by the shooting gaurd when the pt ran by him. The coach called the play to the PT and the assistant coach told the head coach hey the other teams PF is slow to his left run this play and see if it works. then coach takes his advisement ....and it works because everyone did their part.

    before the game all that week in prepping the coach and the assist talk about the game plan. the coach does the initial strategy and the assistant advises and add his input then they tell the team to execute the plan.

    the wife advise the husband after he explains his vision. they develop a strategy and then they execute. teamwork
     
  2. FG

    FG Well-Known Member


    I know that..
    Not quite the same.
    It doesnt apply to a relationship imo.

    and the highlighted part - just wow.
    That simply isnt teamwork in a relationship.

    Im out.. C-ya
     
  3. goodlove

    goodlove New Member

    how is that not team work ?
     
  4. Liquid Swords

    Liquid Swords New Member

    I'm with you. That kind of set up may be cool for some folks but not me.
     
  5. goodlove

    goodlove New Member

    explain.
     
  6. archangel

    archangel Well-Known Member

    Well it isn't close to a marriage. The analogy should have been a 2 on 2 in basketball or a 2 on 2 in tennis. It doesn't matter who gets the point but that someone gets it. Someone is always at the right spot and has the experience to do the job. any one can play any position and no coach is needed or is there. The plan is known. Simple win. It is honestly unpredictable like in tennis or basketball. Whoever is there to the job and has the experience does it.
     
  7. goodlove

    goodlove New Member

    you talking street ball but thats cool....but in any case team work is needed. If one is just an assist person and the other is a great shooter then bam or a both are great shooters then they can play off eachothers strengths. in either case you have to work together and be unselfish.

    as a man he would have to be the MOST unselfish because a man is not to put himself above his wife and family.

    gale sayers said it best....God first. family second and Im last
     
  8. karmacoma.

    karmacoma. Well-Known Member

    Look I'm for 50-50 partners. I like the woman taking some degree of responsibility if only for her own spending money. It's give and take. It's 2010 people. I bet you jokers talking all this 1950s shit don't make enough money to be the sole breadwinner anyway so quit with the BS.
     
  9. goodlove

    goodlove New Member

    we are not talk sole bread winners. we are talking about men being the leaders (setting goals and managing) women assisting (advising men and managing). If the 2 people are going in different directing then how will you be able to accomplish anything ? You guys are basically saying everyone is independent thus u do what you do and I do what i do and let the chips fall where they may.

    mature people are independent but to be a teamplayer (independent but contribute to the success to the whole) is far more an evolve person.

    what people dont realize that men ( leaders) have to be extermely submissive and unselfish than everyone else.
     
  10. karmacoma.

    karmacoma. Well-Known Member

    If men should be the leaders 100% then we should be paying 100% of the way. PERIOD. It's called putting your money where your mouth is.

    I find in my real non-message board life that women's instincts are right damn near 90% of the time anyway, so why push them to a lesser role especially if they're contributing financially to the relationship.

    You'd be surprised how many women will fall in line if you've got bank, feminism goes out the window. If you as a man had dough we wouldn't even be having this convo.
     
  11. goodlove

    goodlove New Member

     
    Last edited: Jul 20, 2010
  12. karmacoma.

    karmacoma. Well-Known Member


    We're not talking about cheating you're changing your own subject. Focus.
     
  13. goodlove

    goodlove New Member

    naw I was talking about the intuition thang. people believe that womens intuition is much higher than men....the person who authored the book spoke otherwise. I was just giving you some backround of what I was going to say. That was intuition of men is just as good as women. we just have to use it.


    also I added more to the message since you wrote just now. see last paragraph
     
  14. goodlove

    goodlove New Member

    here is situation about money in marriage

    here is an article about finance and marriage. so if you are talking about finance who is going to take the lead ? The man right ? women love to say when things are up the first thing a woman say is " you are the man you are to do that"

    so now what is up

    Don't Let Money Problems Ruin Your Marriage partner
    by Good Housekeeping, on Thu Jul 29, 2010 12:07pm PDT

    There’s no right way for married couples to manage their money. But there are plenty of wrong ways. “Financial issues are the primary reason for 90 percent of divorce cases I handle,” says John Thyden, a prominent Washington, D.C., divorce attorney. “But it isn’t necessarily the amount of money a couple has that tends to trip them up. It’s the differences in their spending habits and especially their lack of communication.” Here are some issues to watch out for. And while you're at it, try adopting these habits of the happiest couples.

    1. Relationship Neglect
    Pssst...sometimes arguments about money are actually about not paying enough attention to your marriage (do this to stop having the same fight), rather than your financial situation. When spouses feel neglected, they may resort to spending cash on items they can't afford or bring up their partner's buying habits as a way to retaliate for deeper issues. Examine the root of your fights and determine whether your fiscal concerns are actually a by-product of hurt feelings. Then, if necessary, get started on a marriage makeover.

    2. Love Is Blind
    At the beginning of a relationship, money often isn't an issue. Love can be intoxicating, and some spouses express their emotions by lavishing their partner with exorbitant spending sprees, jetting off to exotic vacations, and other costly pursuits (don't make these money mistakes). Then reality sets in, and couples have to worry about their rent or mortgage, kids and living expenses. A financial planner can help you get your finances back on track and develop a budget that you can stick to. Plus, set out some financial rules to follow as a couple.

    3. When Women Are the Breadwinners
    Women are the breadwinners in one out of three dual-income families today. Although earning more money can be beneficial, it also challenges traditional gender roles, so that wives may feel guilty about putting less time into mom duties while husbands may feel like they've failed somehow. Set up equal spending rights with your spouse so that you're both on the same page.

    4. Keeping Up with the Joneses
    It can be easy for couples to become envious of other couples' spending habits and feel like they need to live beyond their means just to keep up. However, this can lead to debt and put a significant amount of stress on a marriage. Do some digging with your spouse and work together to diminish these insecurities.


    5. A Lack of Open Communication
    Not knowing exactly where your money is going each month can spark resentment. Have an honest conversation with your partner where you both break down the spending in your household. Discuss your priorities and decide together if you need to cut back or add to a specific category.

    Related: How to Save Your Marriage
     

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