Would you divorce or dump a partner who doesnt support your dream or struggle?

Or is that too extreme?


I was coming out of the Army, deciding what I wanted to do. Decided I wanted to go back to work for Best Buy. My wife looked me right in my face and said "So your going to be 35 years old making $12.50











Man if my wife spoke to me like that



It's over off top.

 

Is this something that happened to you?

 

That's not the question here sir.

 

I wouldn't be with someone who didn't support my dreams.

I also wouldn't be with someone if I couldn't support his dreams. A huge part of who I am as a partner in a relationship is about supporting and assisting him in whatever ways I can to realize his dreams.

However, I do think there's something to be said for talking things over with the person you are involved with. I think part of supporting another person is to be a sounding board for them and to talk things out. I think how you do so can make a huge difference.

 

Depends on the dream (if oh girl wants to be a porn star....im out) but for the most part I'm with k.

 

LOL Well that's why I said I wouldn't be with someone I couldn't support in their dreams.

 

I was asking based on the bolded. But, no, I wouldn't be with a woman like that. Military pay isn't the greatest, but it certainly isn't the worst either. Switching to $12.50 isn't much money, but if you are in the military, risking your life, and you get tired of it (I did after a number of years), then your wife can pick up the slack by working as much as you did. If she is not willing to, then by all means, kick her ass to the curb.

Because, at the end of the day, she had no problem with you risking life and limb to provide for her... so she can do the same or shut the hell up.

In regards to the other scenarios presented, it depends on whether it is within reason. If a husband or wife wants to prostitute themselves on camera for a living (porn), then I would say you should probably divorce.

 

Partners need to be ready to support transition, whether it's taking up the slack by paying more bills or just holding things down while the other partner trains/retrains. Sometimes it might take getting a loan. However, the person who's re/training has the obligation to do their best. They shouldn't be enjoying the same freedoms that they were prior to saying they want to retrain/asking their partner to carry extra burden.

So, no, I can't deal with a woman who can't support my dreams. Divorce, ehhh, the burden of a divorce will keep anyone from achieving their dreams so I can't say if that's the best move. Any relationship "less than that" is a judgement call.

Can you make it on your own?
Do you wanna be giving half to someone who didn't support you?

...cause people will hang tough when the goings good, but they'll B-line for the door when things get tough.

 

I'm a student so if she can't deal with me putting school first I'm out. I understand women want men that have time for this and that, but it is what it is.

Selfishness comes out it different ways, one of my friends gave up his Evo for some luxury Lexus because his wife was nagging him. They are not even together anymore. His dream was straight foward and simple yet she couldn't even allow that.

Some things are just a part of a person whether it's what they do or have. Making him give up his car was like making Stark give up the Mark-14, pure selfishness.

 

A man or woman hungry for money and money alone is never worth it. Fuck being with a blindsided materialistic non supportive partner. Kick em to the curb. If my partner suddenly wanted to become a male hoe or become an exhibitionist I would never support that. But apart from that if he wanted to be a fuckin space cadet I'd still support that.

 

Buh Byeee.

I'd be out of there. If we can't be supportive of one another, and lift each other up, then I'd have no interest in being together. I don't know. I know too many people that stay together, forget their dreams, put their life on hold, just to stay in a relationship that they think they're happy in. I'd much rather be single than be with someone that isn't on my side when it comes to things like that.

I would do anything I could to support, and encourage someone doing what they want to do; however, if it happens to be something I am not in support of, such as sleeping around for money, dealing drugs, etc., then I would call it quits. I'd take that as a sign that we're not right for each other.

 

There's a lot to be discussed with this guy's decision/desire to get a job at Best Buy such as long term plans and so on, and so on.

Getting to the actual question.... Yes, I think that's a relationship headed for divorce. It's not about the fact that it's a low paying entry level job. I'm not even suggesting that there's a right and wrong here, but if the two people can't agree and support each others plans/struggle... There's no point in going on.

 

Yeah. If that's what he wants to do then cool. Its not like he is slinging dope. But if the woman wants more then it is what it is.

 

Absolutely! Of course if the person wants to do something illegal... In my mind that's automatically a deal breaker. You're right abut the woman which is why I was saying there's a lot to be discussed.

 

Exactly...

 

Not sure how to answer this.
What does support even mean in this context?
Unless it's something that goes against your ethic or moral system,you should be able to accept your partner's choice of profession/career,yes.
Should you encourage them when they struggle? Yes.

 

hahaha who dreams of working for Best Buy? The girlfriend would be in the right.
Women are programmed to seek men with resources and not for the reasons that you might suspect. Yes they want nice things but more importantly they want a reliable partner who will provide for children. No nice home and college for kids if you're slanging CDs at Best Buy.

 

Nah, fuck that wack bitch. Here's the rest of his post

That was literally the moment where I completely and utterly fell out of love with her. NO woman in the history of my existence has ever been allowed to disrespect me, my work ethic, nor my decision making to such a disgusting level. Especially a woman whose hand I took in marriage...

So I did exactly what I had to do. Started back at the bottom part time and worked myself back to Manager in 5 months. Three promotions, three pay raises (plus bonuses). And after that time period I didn't feel as if she deserved to be a part of my success as she wasn't supportive during my hustle and struggle. Once I made manager she wanted to talk about how proud of me she was and all that shit but I told her straight up I didn't make it because of her. I made it DESPITE of her and I didn't want her nor the marriage any longer. I actually told her all of this two months ago but she begged and pleaded for another chance talking about how sorry she was and she always believed in me and she was just frustrated during that time period. She wanted to go to counseling and I tried it but nah....the damage had been done. Once you disrespect a man.... TRULY disrespect him, he will never forgive you

 

Whoop there it is

 

Hahaha!! Damnnn... Way to go, Jabari! :smt045