I think there is a difference between unconditional love and not accepting unreasonable behavior such as abuse. Just because you choose to walk away in such a situation, doesn't mean your unconditional love ended or that there were conditions. I can walk away, in order to keep myself safe, and still carry unconditional love for that person. You may stop loving that person, but then it wasnt unconditional love for that person. Unconditional love to me, does not equate staying in a relationship, no matter what. It simply means you still love that person, no matter what.. it doesnt mean that you accept all behavior regardless of how unsavory they are. Thus, it may mean, that you have to walk away, in order to be safe etc - but still love that person unconditionally... Love doesnt mean you absolutely necessary need to be together. Love, to me does not conquer all. Unconditional or not. If you love someone that abuses you but still choose to stay, is not unconditional love, that is then something completely different... You can not be together and still carry unconditionsal love. I dont think unconditional love and not accepting abusive (etc) behavior is mutually exclusive. That is just simply how I see it. True, is that it is not common and equally true that its is appropriate many times to simply stop loving that person, but that wasnt part of the unconditional love bit I was talking about. In essence I think we agree
This is a good example Fresh, because unconditional love means loving someone regardless of their qualities or actions, BUT it does not mean staying with them in spite of qualities or actions you can't abide with. Loving someone unconditionally doesn't necessarily mean you belong with that person.
That's what I was getting at when I said if you loved someone but chose to not be with them in a relationship because of something like one of the instances I listed. Technically if you still love them, but don't approve of something they do, such as alcoholism or abuse, that could be termed unconditional love, just not unconditional acceptance. This assumes that you can have one without the other, and I think some would say you can't, but if I understand you correctly FG you are saying that you can. So like most things it depends (just for Ymra) on each person's interpretation. I'll be completely honest and say it wouldn't matter what I felt for a man if he touched me or one of my kids in a negative manner, he'd be gone. In my mind my safety should be a paramount concern to someone who truly loves me, and attempting to abuse me would show me that wasn't the case and therefore I would have to conclude he didn't truly love me. I also wouldn't tolerate alcoholism or drug abuse, I'd be open minded and offer the chance for rehab and be supportive through that process but if he didn't make the effort and succeed, he'd be gone. I do view that as conditional though, and I know that I couldn't offer unconditional love within the confines of a relationship, as in staying in the relationship no matter what, which is how I define unconditional love in that context. That's not to say I wouldn't still love the person if I determine I just couldn't be in a relationship with them, although with abuse I'm certain the instant he hit me love would be gone. I don't like selfish behavior and I do try to be fair and objective, but I'm not gonna let anyone hit me, or potentially kill me, and if he hurt one of my kids love would the last thing on my mind while I was hunting his ass down, because for them I do have unconditional love.
I'm about to show you all how full of myself I can be and tell you what qualities and such, I believe I bring to the table. Impeccable fidelity Humility Compassion Sensitivity Healing potential Optimism Candor Cheerfulness Honesty Enthusiasm Imagination Tenacity Tenderness Care Tolerance Dependability Empathy Selflessness An individual capable of great love. Someone who can find the greatest delight in even the smallest kindnesses. Someone who looks at the inner soul of others, at the essence rather than the surface. Someone truly seeking their soulmate, the most profound love possible. Someone who believes love is unselfish submission of the ego to the desires of the one needed to become Whole. Someone who gains more pleasure from giving than from receiving, more happiness in serving than in being served. And that's all I'm going to say for now.
Although the principals may remain the same, please believe my situation was most different then you would imagine.
No offence.. You dont know what I would do to be in between those thick thighs of yours :smt119 :smt119 :smt119.
