When I was married my wife stayed at home. The first thing that we did was get her joint access to all accounts. We had 3 accounts, an investment account, a savings account and a checking account. We really didn't have an issue with money, if at any point one of us wanted to make a large purchase the other was consulted. Actually, I can only think of one time that was even an necessary.... for my flat screen TV purchase. I dunno, things were pretty simple. Money just wasn't that important to either of us, I suppose.
My wife did. I told her that she could stay home if she wanted or she could work if she wanted, whichever would bring her the most happiness. After a while she started to work so that she'd have something to keep occupied, but that was only until we started having kids.
Some couples just dont have a problem with it. Sounds like you guys worked things out to the satisfaction of both of you. If I were the working partner, I'd bend over backwards to ensure the non-working-outside-the-home partner felt they were an equal person in all financial decisions. Nothing more demeaning than having to ask "Can I have $5 for a new toothbrush, please?"
It definitely wasn't like that. Actually, she had a better idea what was going on with our finances than I ever did. On my salary alone we were saving $400 /month and putting up $300 into our investment account. Woman was a financial wizard. Hell, she came into the marriage with several grand saved up that we used to pay off my debt.
I guess I live by worst case scenarios. I would never trust anyone to take care of me. Even as a child when I wanted books or wanted a halloween costume I use gather cans or sell candy to the kids at school. Nothing makes me more uncomfortable than the idea of relying on another human being. We can be teammates but they means being responsible for ourselves.
I realize how this is going to sound, and I swear I don't mean it to be dickish. Money just isn't that important to me.... and that's all we're talking about here.,. money, money, money.... no matter so many marriages are doomed to fail when they're treated as joint ventures. It seems that you need a business degree to succeed in marriage these days.
agreed. money isn't that important to me, obviously or i would have gone down that path with the ex when we divorced. as long as i'm on an equal footing with my partner in all aspects of the relationship, then i'm happy. there's so much emphasis on the mighty dollar these days and its ability to bring you happiness if you have it that we're losing sight of what really matters in our lives.
It doesn't sound dickish at all fam you're right but I act accordingly. You know whats funny is I have my youtube on shuffle and this came on. Kind of fitting. I guess someone us really need to remember what its like to be a team [YOUTUBE]WO4tIrjBDkk[/YOUTUBE]
I did the same with my ex, but he just ran up more debt! After I divorced, I discovered about $30,000 he'd run up in my name. Took a long time to pay that off!
That's not dickish. My attitude towards money has always been "Ok, well if I need more, I'll make more." Money is how some people keep score. It has no intrinsic value to me. I like nice things, so I made sure I made enough money to have the nice things I wanted. But when I bought my house, they approved me for almost 200K more than I spent. WTF did I want with a 6 bedroom house for just me? So I bought the house I loved, rather than spend on a house that was too big for my needs just because I could.
