Colonial? - topic to discuss

I got this today in my 'Honesty Box' on facebook. If not on facebook...this is something you can import onto your profile page so that ppl can write 'honest' things anonymously. You can't see who the comment is from, so ppl feel that they can be more open presumably...

""Your black guy fetish is really, REALLY creepy and a little colonial."

...

Discuss.

 

Well bets on who sent you that!

Colonial....hmmm I guess that would be alluding to the whole master/slave thing? *scratches head* I don't know.

It seems a little weird that someone would say you had a fetish when you say you prefer black guys. I don't see it as a fetish, maybe I'm wrong. For me a fetish is someone who likes to make love to feet or something else way out of the norm. I can't see how liking black guys means you have a fetish. Well maybe it is :shock:

But creepy, creepy to me is more along the lines of making love to blow up dolls. Me thinks the person has a bone to pick other than accusing you of having a "creepy fetish!"

 

It was a guy - that's the only info that comes up (gender).
I only have approx 4 black guys on my friend list - one would definitely never write that, one MAY have written that, the other two I don't speak to and have no idea about my love life.

More likely to be written by a black or a white guy? it's plaguing me. but the odds are a white guy...have got another 200 white guy friends on the list.

Bone to pick? help - I'm being a little dense, WSD!

I agree with you about the fetish thing. Fetishes are associated with non sexually related, inanimate objects...hardly the way I would describe any man, black or white!! :lol:

 

I don't know exactly what you've written to get a comment like that. But a fetish is a fetish. Nothing "colonial" about that as I can see.

Then I'm actually more worried about me, and my "Africa in general"-fetish. More than one time I've caught myself finding people "cute" or "adorable" for instance because of all the bright colours they wear (especially older women). I'm clever enough not hardly ever to speak those words out loud though, when describing people. Those times my tongue has slipped, I've been forgiven. (Seriously, which words best descibes someone who chooses to put on for instance a bright pink skirt, a bright yellow blouse with flower print, and an equally bright green hat? It has to be "cute", or "colourblind"!)

 

It's not a case of 'writing anything'. My webpage is pretty neutral in terms of things like that...the only thing I have done is recently post an event (my birthday party), invite about 40 friends, and posted up a picture of Djimon Hounsou in the new CK ad as one of the 'pics' for the event!! Otherwise...I tend to keep it all pretty clean on there...if you look at my personal photos, there are ones of black AND white exes up there. It has to be someone who knows me well and my dating history....

just thought the comment was sufficiently inflammatory to be worth a short discussion...

 

Hmmm, I'm just wondering if an "African in general" fetish - or maybe interest is the better word - is something to worry about? If something catches your attention and grabs a little piece of your heart, then that's OK. Doesn't matter if it's a person or a culture.

There's a difference b/t thinking "That's so cute, dont those colors look wonderful on her" as compared to "That's so cute, she doesn't know any better than to wear khaki and grey like the rest of us"

Sounds like you fall into the appreciative category rather than the condescending one.

 

I agree with FSP. My dad is a little the same as you and I don't think there's anything wrong with that: whenever he comes to visit in London, he always wants to stop and look at the groups of African women walking to/from church, as he loves the beautiful, colourful matching outfits that they wear. He isn't being condescending, just appreciative of the effort that people would go to!

 

What I mean MistressB is that it sounds like it is coming from someone you know. And that person probably knows you well. That is a bit too weird/personal. I mean, yeah, you are attracted to white guys but you're like me in that it is the black guys that get you, sexually quicker, hence that tight and tingly feeling *wink*....LOL.......

 

ugh!! Sounds to me like one of your Facebook friends has issues with your dating preference, Mistress B!

I would tend to think that it is a WM... but that's just my gut reaction.

Plus, I'm having a hard time with the term "creepy"... I mean, considering what you've told us about yourself on here, you don't strike me as the type of girl to sit in a pub spend the entire night drooling uncontrollably anytime a BM walks by! Or lurking in bushes staring at BM from afar! But then again... I don't know you in real life.... maybe you are that creepy girl! LOL!! :lol: :lol:

I'm just teasing... I just find the word "creepy" (especially since the person wrote it twice and once in CAPS!) not accurate at all!

I think that I would be very insulted if one of my friends wrote that to me, to be honest. As discussed, having a preference is not a fetish. And "colonial"? Please! If you want to find out who wrote this, I suggest you try and find out who among your friends likes using big words, but doesn't own a dictionary! LOL

 

Urgh that pic is horrible, please take it down! :cry:

 

What a racist picture. Well things have changed and we are more than willing to have sex with beautiful BM. :shock:

 

Well, no argument there...but then when has BM/WW porn ever been PC?

 

Actually I believe Charmer has selected the intended meaning of the person who wrote that response In your web page with the picture. In colonial times it was considered "taboo" esp for a ww to have intercourse with the hired help so to speak. Now keep in mind, This was due to the fact that their husbands were doing it a lot with the female hired help, so of course the men in no way wanted a big black buck turning out one of their southern belles, so tells were told to the women to discourge this most undesirable behavior. A majority of that thinking has been passed down generation to generation. I said all this to say, I think it was a wf who wrote this. Not really a big deal, she just doesn't know any better! What is sad to me is that damn near 500 years later this is still a problem! Oh well. Win some lose some

 

I see where you're going, but it was definitely a guy - the website's system can pick up whether it was a girl or a boy automatically.