How To Turn Down a White Woman

I need some help ... It's this one girl, who keeps coming on to me. Most men wouldn't pass up the opportunity. She's very nice and friendly ... has good values and all. I don't want to hurt her feelings. She would be a very good friend for me. I don't have many white friends (probably because I don't know too many white people). I know this might sound strange, but I'm looking for some advice on how turn down a white woman. I don't want to come off as a "another mean black man." I'm a peaceful brutha, but I just don't know what to say to her. Can y'all help me out?

(I hope I posted this in the right section.)

 

JUST SAY NO!

:twisted:

 

I guess it all depends on how she is coming on to you.

If she comes right up and says, "why dont we go out?" Just say, no thank you. And leave it at that.

If she is just flirting, you can either flirt back or dont. Just dont escillate it.

All in all, the best way to turn anyone down is to turn them down how you would want someone to turn you down.

 

thats a really weird question
if i said to you how should i treat black people - don't you think that'd be strange????
but in answer to your question
be friendly,
polite
firm
just as you would a black woman

 

Turning down people is somewhat like firing people. There is no way that won't piss them off. Just say no and maybe she might just accept it.

 

Pardon me, if I come off a little bit insensitive ... But the last white girl I straight up said no to flipped out on me. I was like no and I said no as nicely as possible. You know what her next question was? She asked me "Have you ever been with a white woman?"I told her no - because I haven't. I was just telling the truth, but not a second later she called me a racist. This all went down in front of a lot of people. They all jumped in, before I had time to explain myself. It was one of the worse days of my life. They had me feeling guilty like I did something wrong. That's why I asked it that way. Please don't take offense to the question.

 

that was one white girl who flipped out, not all of us do if we are not the center of the world . since you guys are friends i would let it slip that you have your eye on someone(even if it is not true). hopefully then she will back off. if not tell her you like her as a Friend, but don't feel that way about her.

 

Well you see, that was your mistake. I started to elaborate on the "no thank you" and didnt. But, you NEVER explain why you are saying no thank you. It only gives room for argument and there is no need to argue about not accepting a date or liason with someone you dont want to. And no need to question yourself either. You dont have to want to date everyone.

When she asked that, you should have just excused yourself and left. Go to the bathroom, go get a soda, go make a phone call, just dont stick around and argue.

 

I don't know if I could look in her eyes and lie to her (My conscience would eat me alive.). And that's one reason why we get along so well anyway ... because we've kind of been confiding in each other. She asks me questions she would be too scared to ask black men, and I do vice versa about white women.

I think the second suggestion you gave me would probably be better.

 

Yeah, I see now that was really stupid of me to stick around and get unfairly criticized. What was I thinking? I guess I just froze up, because I was in shock. I got to keep my cool.

 

whose the boss: YOu never explained to us why you turned her down. Why did you? Is it because you do not date white women? is it that you were not interested in her or the other white woman you turned down?

why is it that you keep turning them down, what did they do to you or do that you were not interested?

 

Why? Well ... Honestly, I'm very suspicious of women who ask me out, because every woman that I said yes to I later heard or found out to be on the "easy" side.

 

well, thats can be all kids of women not just white women

 

That's exactly what I mean. I'm suspicious of all aggressive women.

 

Gee, a woman is aggressive if she asks if you'd like to go out?

Hmm...yes, come to think of it, I've scared a few guys off by asking if they want to get a coffee or beverage.

Anyway, if you just want to be friends with her and you are confiding in each other like friends, the easiest way I know of is to say to her one of the following:

!. It is so great to be friends with you, I'd never want to mess it up by getting all romantic. You're just too valuable to risk losing.

2. It's so great to be friends with you, you're someone I can really talk to. Let me tell you about this hot woman I'm trying to date, maybe you can give me some tips.

3. Thanks for the offer, I'm incredibly flattered, but you're a really important friend and I need friends more than anything else. I hope you are ok with that.

they all work.

Oh, if it's someone who doesn't know you very well, you could be flattered but your girlfriend would kill you, or you are already involved with someone else.

Just pick the one that is the most true for you and you need not lie.

Good luck.

 

Oh please.
Did I understand correctly? Because this ww is coming on to you that makes her "aggressive"... which in turn makes her "easy"??

In your very first post you also said that this particular ww had good values. Do you mean "good values" other than the fact that she's an agressive slut?

Now if you're just not interested that's a whole other story. You turn her down like you would any other woman that is of no interest to you. No need to catalogue her as being easy because she showed interest!!

 

Who's the Boss:

You've got attractive white women coming on to you like that and getting mad when you turn them down? Go ahead pimpin'! I'd say that's a good problem to have; we should all be so lucky. You must be from the old school where a woman is supposed to wait for a man to ask her out. But these days, sometimes women ask guys out, especially women who prefer black men. One reason for this is because of the supposed shortage of good brothers out there. Just because a woman asks you out does not mean she is easy. And if she is easy (and you don't like that sort of thing), then you don't have to be easy along with her. With you being the man, chances are that she's not going to make you do something you don't want to do.

In my pre-white woman days, when I was only dating women of color, there were a few ww that come on to me. I would just get rid of them by acting naive. I'd pretend that I didn't even know they were coming on to me, respond to their comments with short replies, and keep it moving. Most women can handle rejection better than us men. Either they get the message from the vibes you give off or they think you're playing hard to get and see you as a challenge. Most women will do the former rather than the latter.

If all else fails, apply the smackdown! (Just kidding).

Peace.
_____________
"The mind is like a parachute. It works best when it is open." - Rickson Gracie

 

I think that mosiah already said it best.

 

After catching this post, I have to say that I actually understand where the both of you are comin' from here. Good advice.

 

Oh! You got a point there, but she being white has little to do with it or nothing at all ... I think. Well ... I don't know. Well, let me put it like this - if she was an aggressive sista, I wouldn't want to pursue her ... especially after all of the unpleasant surprises I've gotten from them.

But anyways - you're right about the contradiction, because most easy women I know don't value morality. This may change everything, because if I'm contradicting myself - then I'm wrong about something. Right? I might need to reevaluate the situation. Man!