Is this a WW BM forum or an open forum in the end?

GREAT post Moskvichka!! :smt038

I really wish I spoke Russian!!!

I miss the good old days (when I first joined) when other WW were posting much more (Iffy'swifey and Mistress B, among others). I loved reading on their perspectives and experiences as WW in interracial relationships with BM. I felt a connexion to them in having gone through some of the same experiences. It felt like girl-talk at times, which I appreciate so much... more like what you are describing in the Russian forum.

This place is really becoming more and more of a boys club and I'm not sure what the solution might be. Maybe it's just the natural ebb and flow of things and the pendulum will swing back. I just hope that I don't lose interest before then!

 

Thanks! I see your posts too all the time but I missed your background info somehow... I think you live in GB - right, and your boyfriend is African? Or is it Girliekinduk, but you are from Canada?

 

Great to have ya back, Moskvichka. I enjoyed your post as always. If only i could understand Russian :lol:

 

I am Canadian and very single.
I've been dating IR for 5 years now.

 

Cris, if you do not mind I'll ask you a question (and JREMINATOR too since you guys seem to be the only Africans on this board right now, Infiniti left...)

Many of us (white wives) are on our way to Africa with the husbands, and a lot of the girls are concerned about the local women's ways, and the use of voodoo to snatch the man they want. I started a thread about it and asked the following questions:
Do you believe in voodoo?
Do you believe that someone can ruin your family with its use?
Explain your position, whether yes or no.
How does your position correlate with your religion and faith, if you have one?

I would like your feedback as well, guys. Sorry about hijacking the thread, but I think we already have the original issue settled.

 

I am glad you asked this question as i have been posed with it several times by a number of people, black and white alike. The voodoo fetish has often been one used to stereotype us Africans a lot and unsuprisingly enough, it is all some people know about Africa; beside HIV of course. And it has been one thing which has prevaled increasingly and unconsciously into mainstream belief worldwide that every African is asked the question over and over again.

Granted, voodoo is one thing that truly is very common in Africa. A lot of people do it for so many reasons but only those who believe in it. I never have believed in it and neither have my parents nor family members. In fact, my father tells me that my grandfather firmly believed in it but later converted to Roman Catholicism which remains the household practise in my family. I as a Roman Catholic have never believed in the occult nor anything of its kind so i am not afraid of any thing of the kind. This comes despite the fact that i watch so many Nigerian movies which are bombarbed with witchcraft, voodoo and other occult practises. My stand is that if you believe in it, good rhythms to you. I do not and it would be to my discomfort for anyone to try to talk to me about it as i have no interest whatsoever.

As a Roman Catholic, one of the primary dogmas is utmost belief in the faith and as God is, as we are told in the bible a "jealous" God, espousing beliefs in anything other than the word of God is deemed treacherous and will attract unpleasant consequences. That i hold on to which makes me not even think about the whole concept. Therefore, i do not even believe in its existence let alone what it can do to one's family. I do understand the fact that there are a number of people who do not necessarily believe in it but acknowledge that it exists and have some kind of profound fear of it but i am simply not one of them. I have seen the whole thing depicted in mainstream African culture but i have never been bothered to think of it because i feel it is up to those who believe in it and its a waste of my time.

 

This is exactly the case, and I appreciate your perspective. At this point in my life I am attempting to introduce my mind to the idea of God, as I was raised in non-religious society. I don't have a base, and therefore all religions and all these occult and parapsychological things puzzle and intrigue me. Mine is exactly the case of "if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything" :cry:

 

:smt038 :smt038 :smt038 :smt038 :smt038 :smt038

What difference will arguing with someone you don't know who doesn't know you make? Even if you prove them wrong or silence them (like many trolls do), how much will you succeed in changing their opinions?

If anything, you're going to feed more into the stereotypes they spreading and give them more ammo to hurt you the next time. The intelligent people on this site will see through their ignorance and ignore them.

 

You're right man. I just got caught up on all the threads and realize that a lot of my ideas have already been stated. My bad, I guess it's the old saying great minds thi......

 

They come here as freely as whites go on black and African sites to express their views. Here's what a WW had to say on a Nigerian site in response to a WM who is with a Nigerian woman:

 

I think it's good for BW to come here for no other reason than to understand the true mentality of BM. We should know what to do with this helpful information. I've been on boards where WW have insulted BM and their only response was to speak disparagingly of BW. I was so glad when an Asian woman pointed this out.

 

The ones who do this unfortunately won't get you logic.

 

Each of them left because of comments from BM which they don't seem to notice.

 

Not really. This place is great for understanding how you truly feel and we need to come to grips with it. We can now take the blinders off where you are concerned and shed all feelings of connection to you and these comments help that process. With all the reports coming out concerning BM your ammo is rendered useless in light of the facts on the ground.

 

I understand this too, and for the same reason I've sometimes found myself on boards where BM and African men speak disparagingly of WW, also lumping us all together into one "pinky toe Becky" (that was a good one! :lol Just humans being humans, right?

The information I collected (and most posts were similar to the one I quoted earlier) was not of any direct use me, because I don't exhibit the behaviours of an "easy", "sugar mama", "looking for a thug" etc woman. It just made me feel happy, time and time again, that I found an African man who was willing to see me for who I really am.

 

Lexington wrote:

No offense, but I really don't understand why would you want to understand the "true mentality of BM" here, when the statistics show that only a small percentage of BM are into WW. This sounds like you want to understand the true mentality of BM who are into WW.......why do that in the first place, do they have to have "a mentality" to date WW? Is it a deviation, an abnormality which needs to be microscopically studied and understood?
The BM who like WW are some freaks from the circus? :arrow: lets go and see whats the deal with these crazy men that they started to date WW. How come you dont focus on the mentality of 90% of the BM, which are those who date BW?
If there was a BWWM site, and maybe there is, I would have no curiousity whatsoever to check the WM in there and see "their true mentality" = why in the world do they date BW. None. As someone said, because they can, and because they chose to. Thats enough for me, no need to go into deep analize like there's something wrong with them, or with WW.
I'm just asking.

 

Yes, you're feeding into the stereotypes about bw being confrontational, controlling, overly demanding, and with unnecessary attitude. Notice that you used the word 'stereotype' and not fact as not all bw behave that way. Take notes from those bw that don't because you could learn something.

If all you were doing was coming in here to learn how bm felt, you would have just stuck to reading the comments and nothing else. If this were the case, then why do you feel the need to reply to every single comment that annoys you even in the slightest, silence anyone who writes something that you disagree with, scare away other members and dominate the forums in the process?

I know that some people will not agree with my comments nor likewise, will I agree with theirs. I don't lose sleep over it. It's a part of life. So deal with it. The odd time I will rebut certain comments, but let most slide because I carefully choose my battles.

What feelings of connection can you feel for me, when you don't even know me from the next person. You and I know nothing about each other's culture, upbringing, beliefs, values, interests, goals, class, education and the other things that define us as a individuals. Long ago, I evolved beyond the point of relating to people only on the basis of colour.
We may share the same colour, but our similarities may end just there. So, I don't feel connected with people I don't share much in common with.

For someone who has shed all feelings of connection to me, you sound awfully hurt by even the slighest comment of mine that you disagree with.

Peace.

 

Tell it like it is, Seychelles and Genuine. At least there are people in here who aren't as gullible as many people in here seem to be.

 

:arrow: Personally I think it should be mainly for BM & WW but others shouldn't be barred from posting either as long as their comments aren't abusive.

 

:smt038 :smt038 :smt038 :smt038 :smt038
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: