Personal Ads

I've got to say these personals are pretty bad. There are people who are married and still looking!! Others are just looking for discrete relationships.
There should be a way to limit the numbers down to the people who are serious about a relationship.

Has any one ever used the personals and met some one yet?

 

I just look for entertainment purposes.

 

Conversations/Personal Ads.

I subscribe, and while I find a few objectionable, there are some ladies who are sincere in their desire for a relationship. I have corresponded with a few.Distance was an unfortunate deciding factor, but I just remain patient and optimistic.

 

Re: Conversations/Personal Ads.

Distance is a factor huh?

Last time I checked it cost about HALF as much to fly from the East Coast to ANYWHERE in Western Europe.

Most Europeans only make to the East Coast as its very expensive to travel to Los Angeles for most Europeans.

So basically its a BAD EXCUSE.

Life is what you make of it....

Just think about how much MONEY you spent on American women in the last decade and you'll see the small amount spent looking for somebody over here (I am over here!) would be WELL worth it.

 

Conversations.Personal Ads

:? I don't think you understand.The decision was MUTUAL.In some instances the ladies I corresponded with simply stated that they were interested, but that it wasn't right for them at this time to work with a long distance relationship.
Distance in relationships is a factor when deciding on what the next steps will be.I don't just casually fly out or vice versa if there is a considerable distance.It takes time to develop a friendship and to get to know another person.
So no, I 'm not using excuses when I consider distance for a possible relationship and neither are the correspondents.I think in a post in April I explained that I'd travel almost anywhere for a soulmate.
Thanks for your thoughts anyway.

 

Re: Conversations.Personal Ads

Ain't it the truth...
I think most of us would fly to meet a known soulmate but that sure ain't the same as flying to meet some random internet ad who may be a soulmate.

 

Agreed, I've done long distance for a long time, it's hard and I would not be that open to it at this point in my life, however if I feel a strong connection with someone I would try to make it work.

It's a personal decision and has nothing to do with whether or not a ticket NYC to Amsterdam is about the same as NYC to Seattle. It goes beyond that.

 

Yeah the personal ads on here are something else. When I first got on here I signed up for them but I didn't renew. Just didn't work for me. Having said that you really never know where you are going to find love so do whatever you fell is best.

 

The personals are a representation of what black man/white woman relationships are all about in the eyes of so many people. Lust is what brings us together and without the sexual part of the relationship, it appears that black men and white women would hardly ever share similarities...or so it seems

sad but true...

 

Lust and attraction is what brings most people together (initially) - seems it's more interesting for other people to talk about when there's some good skin contrast going on. Guess I haven't looked around - do the personals blatantly focus on sex types/desires? Are they more sexually explicit than other types of personals on other sites?

 

It's a mix.
Many are looking for "real" relationships.
Some just want pure sex and nothing more.

 

Lust and attractive might bring two people together, however when one party views the other as nothing more than a walking dildo, then thats where the problem is.........

My observation is that out of +/- 2000 female profiles on the personal section. About 50% are married, 25 divorced, and 25 single. Out of the married females, atleast 90% are "cuckold" and the main reason they seek black men to sleep with, is to make hubby jealous....

Out of the divorced women, atleast 90% of them are pretty much "damaged" goods, and any man with a sense of decency would walk right passed them.

Out of the single women, 80% live over seas. The other 20 dont look to "classy" in my book ..

Just an observation

 

Hmmm, I would guess that's pretty normal. But that isn't Jay's point, I suppose. More along the lines of other people looking past the norm and using the extremes as examples.

 

So much gets lost in translation in forums - so to clarify, do you think WW as a whole look at BM as walking dildos? Or just some of them think that?

 

Conversations.The Personals

:? Jay:
I respect your personal observations if you have perused the personals and come to your own conclusion on that.
I would have to beg to differ with you classifying some people as "damaged," however.I just think that's a little too subjective to make that call.We do not know for one, how old the ads are, how the poster may have changed since then, etc, and it's a little harsh to call someone damaged based on a divorce or the women having children.
I will agree with you that quite a few of the ads are seeking stereotypical situations to engage in, "cuckolds." There's no denying that.But I think it also depends on what you hold to be "desirable" or "not."
As for the women being located overseas, I agree that on this side of the pond the distance would be a consideration, but if the situation were genuine, would a woman being from overseas stand in the way of my desire for her?No.
You make a solid point when you say that some of those ads perpetuate stereotypes about the black male/white female dynamic, but I'd submit that we could stereotype a lot of other niche sites or online personal ad sites too.Just my .02, and it's good to see you posting again.
Thanks.

 

Re: Conversations.The Personals

[quote="Wedlock
it's a little harsh to call someone damaged based on a divorce or the women having children.
.[/quote]

Wedlock - Notice my constraint on the issue! Impressive, eh? :wink:

 

Conversations/Restraint.

:smt039 Touche'. The only difference I'd point out is that Master Jay isn't a troll with deep seated psychological issues.His posts are intelligent, and even if I disagree with him, he responds in an intelligent manner.
But still, duly noted fnnysmrtprtty, duly noted.

 

blackmasterjay is just young...that's where he gets this "damaged goods" mindset...i can't wait til he is older and finds himself single and women look at him as having too much baggage or being damaged goods...

 

Conversations/The Personals

Okay, well being "young" may shape his views on the subject. I just know that in my 30s I certainly don't see things in the same way I did say 10 years ago.So I'd agree with lipstick that later on his views will change as he matures because time only moves forward.
However, I still stand on the idea that divorce and children DO NOT mean anything close to "damaged goods."So when I go through the "personals" here I pay more attention to what they post about specifics in relationship desires rather than their status as in being divorced, etc. That's just my opinion though-YMMV
Thanks.

 

While I completely understand that not everyone is interested in dating someone who has kids (would not be my first choice either) I think it's the choice of words "damaged goods" that is just wrong.