Sick & Tired of Wiggers! I Want a Regular White Girl!

OK so here is my dilemma. I've always been attracted to ALL kinds of white women. But the only kind I seem to have any type of success with is the "wigger" type (meaning the kind that only listen to rap, talk & act "black", and only date black guys). I'm just tired of these types of girls because they aren't the type I can see myself falling in love with for some reason. I also know that these relationships (I am in one now) hardly last long for me. These types of girls throw themselves at me and I have no problem at all getting them to like me, but the longer they get to know mw the more they realize I am not your "typical black guy" (aka not as "thugged out" as they're used to) and therefore they lose interest.


I've always seen myself marrying the "regular" type of white girl. One who acts "white", and seems to only date white men but is open to dating interracially. These are the kinds of girls I tend to fall the hardest for. And these types of girls almost never are interested in me and it really pisses me off.

It's like, for the wigger girls, they think I'm sexy and all, and they wanna date me, but the more the get to know me, the more they see I'm not 'black enough".... and despite "regular white girls" liking the way I am and the way I act and surprisingly enjoying how "different" I am from the "typical black guy", for them obviously I'll never be "white enough" so with them, we get along and all but I never get past the "good friend" stage with them.


This dilemma is nothing new for me but now it's gotten to a whole new level. I recently got involved with this girl one could describe as "wigger" (she's 21 and has two young kids from a previous relationship with a hispanic guy) who I like alot and she likes me alot as well. We get along and I thought she could be the one "wigger" girl I fall for...

...BUT...

...there's this really sexy, shy, classy, blonde "typical" white girl from my school I used to go to who I have had the HUGEST crush on since the day we met (about a year ago) and we recently began talking again and spent several hours chatting/flirting Saturday night over the phone and it brought back all my old feelings for her, and it made me see what I feel for her (sexually, emotionally, etc.) is a MILLION times stronger than whatever I thought I felt for this new "wigger" girl that I'm dating.

And I just now realize that it may be this way forever. I tried to change it but I can't. I've really tried extremely hard to see wigger girls in the same way I see "regular" ones but it's impossible. They are so different in the way they carry themselves, look, act, etc. Now this girl has a boyfriend (white of course) but it seems according to her they are nothing serious, so of course that got me thinking, but I shouldn't be "thinking" those thoughts, I have someone I'm dating. So.....


A) is that cheating?

B) how do I get "typical" white girls to be more open to dating me?



Thanks for reading, didn't mean to make this so long but it's been driving me crazy and I'd appreciate some advice.....

 

Where are you meeting women?

Stop dating women you don't really want to be with. Up your standards. Go without sex if you have to until you find someone that you aren't just using for sex. *gasp*

It's ok to have a preferred type but if you keep allowing into your life the type of girl that you don't want then you aren't going to have a chance with the type you do want.

Yeah, it'd be cheating if you guys are involved with someone else. Break it off with "wigger girl" (that felt really icky to type) and focus all of your extra energy on attracting the type of person you really want to be with.

 

Having gone through hell with a few different controlling guys, I realized that it was the issues I had with myself that caused me to, apparently, seek out guys who controlled me. So, I spent the last few years figuring out what was "wrong" with me, and then working on fixing it. I did a ton of research, and read loads of books, and did a lot of thinking and working on myself.

You need to figure out why you attract the certain type of girls that you do, and work on fixing that. Once you do that, you'll have a better chance of finding the right girl for you. And I'm with allilyn, don't date someone you don't want to, just to have someone. It's unfair to the girl, and unfair to you, because like allilyn said, you could miss out on an opportunity to meet a girl that you'd rather date, if you're busy dating girls that are just "filling space" in your life.

 

alot of wigger girls arent really that way deep down inside, alot of the time its just a facade.

I sort of understand this cos when I was younger I used to act all thuggish to get the sexy white girls. But as I got older I realised these sort of women are either low self esteem chicks who wanted someone who they felt didnt think much of himself so wouldnt judge them, or girls who were just curios. The sad thing is as a man I knew that those girls wanted me for these reasons, but I didnt care, I just wanted some action, and anytime I put on the thuggish persona, it was easy, I mean really easy and Im not talking about no two-bit beach whale types, some of the chicks I landed were in FHM in and Maxim, they are models today.
My point is those wigger chicks might just be into black guys and think the easiest way to make themselves seen as open to being with black guys is to act stereotypically black. what you may find when you look deeper is that those wigger chicks may not be so different to the other chicks your looking at.

Dont beat yourself up about it though. I asked myself the same questions your asking now. The girl I go out with now has been out with white guys, but was "black only" when I met her and she really is into hiphop and rnb, but she isnt no ghetto chick, she is a very classy well kept woman who looks after herself and respects me, so i in turn respect her and want to be with her even more.

As long as you are motivated, take care of yourself physically, and handle yourself financially, then good women will always be available to you, no chick was unavailable to me when I was single.

what you have to remember is that good women are rare so they arent just going to fall on your lap, but they will always be open to dating a good man. A good black man no matter what any woman tells you is always something in demand. once you understand this you will be able to double the action you get, I now genuinely understand this and now handle the wigger chicks as well as the classy ones.

In the end its all luv, homey .

 

You get back what you put out, I think you should hang around a better class of women of hang in different spots, hell you in film school you should be meeting all kinds of regular honeys there.

 

Re: Sick & Tired of Wiggers! I Want a Regular White Girl

I can relate to almost all you posted above. My advice is to leave the situation you are in now for sure, it is not fair to her (or her kids) if she is not truly where your desire lies, and you are not being true to yourself. The only advice that worked for me before I met my wife when I was going through a somewhat similar situation to you, is to remain true to yourself, DON'T SETTLE for less than you want no matter how much it hurts or how long it takes. I know it sounds trite to say "you will meet the right woman when the time is right" but it really is true, and when she does come, both she and you will both be the reward you worked so hard to achieve. I know that is true in my case, my wife is everything I always wanted and then some. I shudder to think where I would be if I gave up and settled for less before I met her. Don't give up, if finding the right person was easy, then everyone could do it.

 

Re: Sick & Tired of Wiggers! I Want a Regular White Girl

Also, I see you are in New York, not too far from Canada, in my experience, you will fine A LOT more open minded "regular" White women there. Back in my single days, I would notice that I would get a lot more interest from "quality" women of all backgrounds whenever I travelled there. Of course, racism exists everywhere so your experience may vary.
Worth a shot though.

 

I think so,too. I 've seen some women down here who actedlike a "wigger" but werent really like that.
People should stop playing games.Men AND women.

 

I’ve met some ww who grew up in the inner city and acted black because they were just being themselves so that was acceptable to me because they clearly weren’t overacting their everyday persona. I can usually tell if a person is pouring it on too thick or not.

As far as trying to find a regular ww, I don’t blame you because it’s way more interesting to find someone who is just being themselves. The “wigger” thing is all an act, and it always has been. William Shakespeare said it himself:

“All the world is a stage”.

 

you all are exactly right. i tried to tell myself that i had feelings for this new girl but i really don't. i was just lonely and desperate and she was interested and so i took her (and her kids) in. maybe a part of me felt sorry for her too. she put the whole "single mom running from an abusive ex" guilt trip story on me and How could I say no? But i gotta tell her the truth, as hard as it's gonna be. It's not fair to her that I dont feel what I claim to feel and definately isnt fair to her that im "talking" to two other girls (of the REGULAR non-wigger type thankfully) who I'm FAR more interested in on the side. I guess she was my safety net in thinking that if my bad luck with normal white girls continues and nothing materializes with either of these two hotties, at least I have her to fall back on. As f*cked up as that sounds, thats what I guess she was to me.



...I just gotta cut her loose, F*ck it! thanks people.

 

Re: Sick & Tired of Wiggers! I Want a Regular White Girl

Stop being so fucking long-winded.

 

Re: Sick & Tired of Wiggers! I Want a Regular White Girl

You must offer that type of Hardcore Hip Hop vocabulary or attire to make a relationship begin in the first place. For if it was not so, they would realize you are not the guy they are looking for within 30 seconds.

Take it from me who primary attracts the type of Women you are seeking.

Look into yourself mate. You may find your demeanor is preventing you from meeting such a Woman. How we define ourselves in society will attract the type of people we most suit.

Allow me to repeat myself again.

Look into yourself mate. You may find your demeanor is preventing you from meeting such a Woman. How we define ourselves in society will attract the type of people we most suit.

Cheers!

 

Well, the wigger chick, or as I like to called them, suburban hoodrats(assuming they are from the suburbs or any other place that isn't the hood), ain't worth messing with in my opinion. She has 2 kids you said. Wouldn't surprise me if she wanted to you to play daddy, and pay for hella shit. Forget that man. I've never been in a relationship, but to me, that shit is all bad with the kids.respect y

 

I see what you're saying complex but that's not my problem. I can adjust easily depending on the type of white girl I'm with. I can fit in with ghetto chicks as well as I can fit in with suburban girls. I can talk rock music with white girls I meet at the mall shopping in hot topic and name every track on the latest Metallica album, and at the same time I can hang with a girl from the south and talk about Nascar or country music. I can go out with a wigger chick and use all the "thug" slang in the world and blend in with her and her friends. I dont carry myself like a thug, but I can if I need to. I'm like a chameleon, I can fit in with any crowd. So when I see the girl I'm going after, I act accordingly.


I just need someone who I can be myself with at all times, my FULL self. Someone who will accept me for me. It's just so hard for me to find a classy white girl whose eclectic enough and open minded enough that dates interracially. The blonde I was talking to on the phone saturday who I went to school with is the WHITEST white girl you can imagine. She didnt even know what BET was. Never heard of the channel. That says it all. Then there's the wigger chick with 2 kids I been seeing. And recently I met this Hungarian brunette model who is ridiculously gorgeous who dates mostly black men but doesn't act wigger at all and is very classy and sexy and sweet. I just gotta keep my fingers crossed that something will work out. I guess the root of it all is: wigger girls are attracted to me physically but dont like my personality (too white), and regular girls like my "white" personality but apparently arent too attracted to me physically, so i get stuck in the friend zone and they dont wanna date me. It's getting very frustrating....

 

I had that problem too, playboy. Many of the girls who were interested in me were definitely into hip-hop/R&B, acting "black", and the like. I listen to rock and metal. I wanted someone who shared my musical intersts. That was until my current girlfriend came along. She doesn't try to be anyone else but herself. She likes all sorts of music from all genres. She wears regular clothes that your average 20-something female college student wears. But the most important thing is that she love me for who I am and I love her for who she is.

You have to go for the women that you like and who you have intersts with. It'll mean striking out a few times (I know lol). But it'll be worth it when you finally find that special girl

Just my two cents

 

That might be your problem. If I had thought for a second that my husband had the ability to be "ghetto" I would not have been interested. That doesn't mean that he can't carry on a conversation with any person he meets or that he looks down on any type of person--I assure you he doesn't. However, he's is who is he is. Always. He's not going to act more white or more black to fit in with anyone.

So, who are you? You shouldn't have to be anyone but who you are.

Be YOU, baby. Just be you.

 

Ever heard the term "Jack Of All Trades Master Of None"?

That’s what it sounds like you are capable of doing. However, that type of versatility may come across as fake if lets say a girl from Danbury, Connecticut you just started dating heard you chatting as if you were from Harlem while giving her the impression that you are not that type of person.

I understand your moods change but, which personality is your primary?

That is the one, which will shine the most, even when you are speaking differently in order to put others in their comfort zone.

For instance; I was dating a Latina girl that was heavily into Hip Hop which didn’t fit the criteria based on her attire last year and, upon looking at me she knew I wasn’t into that lifestyle. She told me that she wasn’t into Black guys because the ones she kept attracting were all Thugs and, couldn’t understand why she kept getting those types of guys.

One day, we were discussing our likes and dislikes. I specifically told her I don’t like loud ghetto girls and, would dump a girl in a heartbeat if she carried on in such a manner behind closed doors more so in public. Little that I know, she was one and, pretended not to be so. And while she tried her best to conceal it, her actions were glowing like a lighthouse on a misty night as time progressed. I would say she fell into a comfort zone with me and, unleashed her true colours unknowingly. How she spoke to her friends was the dead giveaway. Had I not met any of her friends that seem to have this negativity on basically everything, I would not have known. It was her friends who helped confirm my suspicions.

She was at the crossroads and couldn’t seem to figure which direction to go in terms of lifestyle. She new her friends were the root of some of her problems yet, she kept clinging on. Needless to say, we broke up.

With that being said, I pose this question to you Sir.

While many tend to show their best when meeting someone they find most attractive, it is only a matter of time when both parties fall within their comfort zone. Some are more extreme than others which will dictate if the relationship blossoms or sours.

Could it be that you have fallen within your comfort zone with these ladies, showing your true colours inadvertently in which, they see and, understand that it would be best to remain only friends?

There are plenty out there. You may want to expand on the type of friends you hang out with in order to meet them. How many friends do you have that are not black that you literally hangout with. You know, two guys go into a bar, see two Women and strike a conversation.

Cheers!

 

take a trip to wisconsin.....hahahahahahhahahahaha

 

I guess the "real me" one could say is alot like a suburban kid who knows alot about ghetto culture but is at his most comfortable in the suburbs. i hang out with whoever i meet, which is a pretty wide range of people. i actually have more female friends than guy friends since i try and stay on good terms with my ex-girlfriends. my best guy friend could pass for a young fat joe and he dont party, in fact he's kinda like George from Seinfeld, very cynical and somewhat of an angry loner. He's the most hilarous person I know but I aint meeting girls through him, thats for sure LOL.


I mean, I dont mind being with wigger type girls, I just have always wanted something more meaningful with a NORMAL girl. I've only really been in love twice. The first time was with a sweet, hyper, kind, southern girl who i dated for three years named kristen. she was the one normal girl I got to be with me. But, her racist parents and friends convinced her to break up with me .


The other girl I loved (and still love) is, believe it or not, a "wigger" type white girl named nicole. She's probably the only ghetto white girl I could see myself with forever. She is one of the most gorgeous girl ive ever met. we are still extremely close friends to this day and talk all the time. we fight alot. we are always back and forth about the way she lives her life, being friends versus being together, etc. i still love her ALOT and would do anything for her. I'd die for her. she's really troubled and a pure example of why im sick of these types of "ghetto" girls. she's been arrested (she currently has a court date coming up for shoplifting) and has run away from home numerous times.

i dunno why i care about her so much but i do (and it aint cause i feel sorry for her, its much deeper than that). I love her so much. I just want the best for her. i know i may make her seem like a b*tch but she's really sweet when you talk to her and get to know her. her life is really F*cked up and I've tried so hard to give her a way out but she just won't listen. I get fed up and wash my hands of her and stop talking to her for months at a time, next thing you know, she'll contact me again and tell me her latest drama and i fall for it all over again. one minute she got a temper and is telling me to stay out of her life, the next she is crying and asking me to help her. it kills me. im kind of a hypocrite because i scold her for all the bad boys she dates yet here i am head over heals for a bad girl who disapoints me as much as those guys disapoint her.

I guess in comparison to some black guys I know who get NOTHING i need to stop complaning, I have many options, some have none. I should be thankful i know, but i just get mad when i see other people have long healthy loving relationships and i cant go more than a month with a girl without something going wrong. Alot of my friends think I have it made but they have no clue lol...

 

Is it me or it the term actually "wigga" as opposed to "wigger"? :smt102

Personally I don't use either one, I just refer to all of them as "bunnies".