Trust

I don't understand why it is so hard to trust the person you love. I just got off the phone with my long distance (yes it sucks and is super hard) boyfriend, the man I love and can see myself with for the rest of my life, but yet I don't completely trust him. And it is really bothering me, since trust is not only an issue in our relationship but with many people I know. I'm not talking about the I think he might cheat on me trust, because I absolutely trust him in that regard, but its like I'm holding back a piece of me just in case he hurts me. Am I the only one who feels this way? So if anyone has some input I'd really appreciate it.

 

Well, Trust is a subset of love, and if you truly love him you will just have to trust that he is being true. He trusts you or he wouldnt be having a long distance relationship with ya.

good luck

 

Got 2 questions: Has he shown himself untrustworthy? Have you told him about your fears?

 

Could be one of two things.

Either you have issues with trust that you need to work on.

Or your spirit is trying to tell you something.

 

That is because there is no correlation between trust and love. Trust is earned!

 

Yup.

 

i'm going through the same thing....well without the long distance relationship bit.
i sometimes doubt my fella - but when i think about it rationally i know he has never done anything to me to make me doubt him, nor has he cheated on any of his exes - so he hasn't got a history of cheating.
when you are feeling good about urself - ask yourself why you shouldn't trust him....has he cheated on you, has he cheated on his ex girlfriends.
or have you cheated on him - and its a guilty conscience?
i think you'd probably find most people who are doubting their partners is cos of issues they have with themselves.
work on building your self confidence.
and if he cheats on you dump him cos he's not worth knowing

 

I don't know about other people, but in my relationship it was also like this in the beginning, but after a couple of years trust settled in. I remember he didn't want me to go out with my friends, he used to go ballistic actually. Myself also, I used to check the incoming calls on his phone and once I found a sentimental letter from his ex-girlfriend and I was sitting there and reading it and crying, yeah I was... but now it's different, he even told me that he KNOWS I'd never cheat on him because my heart wouldn't let me, and I said it's not about my heart, but self-respect rather (because my heart changes its mind and tells me all kinds of things at times, but he ain't gotta know all that. I won't act on it, and that's what matters...)

I'd just give it time and not give him any reasons not to trust you from your end, everything will be alright.

 

I am feeling much better now, I think it was the kind of day I was having because it was definitely one of those days I'd rather forget. But it's great to know that I'm not alone. I'm not worried that he'll cheat on me, we've been friends for years and if that was an issue I never would have gotten involved, and I can proudly say I've never cheated on a boyfriend. I think it was mostly the long distance getting to me. Oh, and Seven, you really gave me something to thing about. I always thought love and trust went hand in hand, but you have a point about trust being earned.