Attraction to Black Men = Perversion?

[Summerred]

Romantic or inappropriate? Thoughts?

This is weird in a new level, but i will try to be nice here because i don't know this people or their relationship, i could see this being pure ignorance, they probably saw this as some "romantic" photoshoot (yes, people can be that stupid and i wouldn't be surprise if some of their close "friends" said that this wasn't a bad idea) and then they got the worst reaction from people. They probably had the moment "Shit, we fucked up but it's out there now" and the social media don't forget. A lesson was learned after this, a least i hope. Anyway, i wish them a good marriage, if they are so bizarre or just stupid together, they deserve each other lol but for real, i hope they never do this again using their future kids. They should try to be better parents. Don't fail with your kids.
People keep exposing so much about their relationship on social media for attention, they really could have save themselves from this public shame, not everything need to be share,

 

[Peach State Scholar]

Romantic or inappropriate? Thoughts?

Nope.

 

[orejon4]

Romantic or inappropriate? Thoughts?

Unacceptable on so many levels.

This is weird in a new level, but i will try to be nice here because i don't know this people or their relationship, i could see this being pure ignorance, they probably saw this as some "romantic" photoshoot (yes, people can be that stupid and i wouldn't be surprise if some of their close "friends" said that this wasn't a bad idea) and then they got the worst reaction from people. They probably had the moment "Shit, we fucked up but it's out there now" and the social media don't forget. A lesson was learned after this, a least i hope. Anyway, i wish them a good marriage, if they are so bizarre or just stupid together, they deserve each other lol but for real, i hope they never do this again using their future kids. They should try to be better parents. Don't fail with your kids.
People keep exposing so much about their relationship on social media for attention, they really could have save themselves from this public shame, not everything need to be share,

Definitely cringeworthy. I agree with you about couples doing less public sharing. Less is more.

 

[Summerred]

Now about the attraction between BM and WW honestly i just feel like this is a problem to people who seem afraid of the Idea of a new wave of biracial kids. When people see this couples together they think that in the future they will bring more biracial kids and this is "problematic".
I find weird that in the past not so far away people weren't allowed to have IR, they had to fight for this freedom and now that they don't have an excuse to push BM and WW away from each other they try to find another way using some mind control narrative to make this pair feel bad or ashamed of their attraction for each other, like if It was almost a hate crime against your community if you enjoy someone from another race.
I bring this back from Wikipedia when someone try to put down relationship or marriage between black and white people.


I know that in this particular situation the story was about a WM/BW couple but it's not like BM/WW was less hated by the white society during that time.
There is a reason why this was an issue in the past, a reason why the state tried to dictate who people should date/married based on their race and the reason was white supremacy who still is a thing and probably never will disapear. If after all this years someone still try to dictate others people relationship based on their race, i just feel like this person is supporting white supremacy while try frame this opinion like some black empowerment act.

 

[missshyness]

Now about the attraction between BM and WW honestly i just feel like this is a problem to people who seem afraid of the Idea of a new wave of biracial kids. When people see this couples together they think that in the future they will bring more biracial kids and this is "problematic".
I find weird that in the past not so far away people weren't allowed to have IR, they had to fight for this freedom and now that they don't have an excuse to push BM and WW away from each other they try to find another way using some mind control narrative to make this pair feel bad or ashamed of their attraction for each other, like if It was almost a hate crime against your community if you enjoy someone from another race.
I bring this back from Wikipedia when someone try to put down relationship or marriage between black and white people.

View attachment 18178
I know that in this particular situation the story was about a WM/BW couple but it's not like BM/WW was less hated by the white society during that time.
There is a reason why this was an issue in the past, a reason why the state tried to dictate who people should date/married based on their race and the reason was white supremacy who still is a thing and probably never will disappear. If after all this years someone still try to dictate others people relationship based on their race, i just feel like this person is supporting white supremacy while try frame this opinion like some black empowerment act.

I find some people's fears and argument about having mixed kids kind of silly, and I have heard some say from both sides, both black and white claim that it will dilute their race, like they are somehow going to disappear. They have nothing to fear, most people go for their own anyhow, I just had a lengthy discussion about my recent experience and disappointment with this.

With ancestry DNA testing from various companies, although some are skeptical of those, many people who think they are a pure this or that are in fact already mixed or biracial anyway, so the idea of being a "pure" race is out the window. The only thing "pure" about the pure race thing is it is pure bull-!@#$.

We are all human, and made up of the same various elements, just in different proportions, it is foolish humans who create artificial boundaries.

 

[Summerred]

I find some people's fears and argument about having mixed kids kind of silly, and I have heard some say from both sides, both black and white claim that it will dilute their race, like they are somehow going to disappear. They have nothing to fear, most people go for their own anyhow, I just had a lengthy discussion about my recent experience and disappointment with this.

With ancestry DNA testing from various companies, although some are skeptical of those, many people who think they are a pure this or that are in fact already mixed or biracial anyway, so the idea of being a "pure" race is out the window. The only thing "pure" about the pure race thing is it is pure bull-!@#$.

We are all human, and made up of the same various elements, just in different proportions, it is foolish humans who create artificial boundaries.

This also happen with asian community and jewish community, we see asian woman getting married with WM, i see some with BM but some asian parents are full against this and the same with jewish families. They think they are preserving their culture while they are actually excluding people who aren't from their same circle.
While we are all human the truth is that white privilege is real around the world and If a WW get married and have a biracial kid with a BM she know or a least should know that this kid probably will face racism in some point. I think just days ago i saw a white mother crying because her biracial kid was killed by some cop. Sadly this things still happen.
I'm not saying that WW shouldn't have biracial kids but while they don't care about their kids color skin the white supremacy still see this kids like less than a white kid and they don't think twice before hurt them because they know that justice don't work as it should be when it's about protect other races.

 

[missshyness]

This also happen with asian community and jewish community, we see asian woman getting married with WM, i see some with BM but some asian parents are full against this and the same with jewish families. They think they are preserving their culture while they are actually excluding people who aren't from their same circle.
While we are all human the truth is that white privilege is real around the world and If a WW get married and have a biracial kid with a BM she know or a least should know that this kid probably will face racism in some point. I think just days ago i saw a white mother crying because her biracial kid was killed by some cop. Sadly this things still happen.
I'm not saying that WW shouldn't have biracial kids but while they don't care about their kids color skin the white supremacy still see this kids like less than a white kid and they don't think twice before hurt them because they know that justice don't work as it should be when it's about protect other races.

Oh yes, I am well aware of white privilege, I don't need to be told about that, and I am also aware that one cannot pretend white privilege and racism does not exist. I know biracial kids do face some cruel challenges, where they can end up not being accepted by either community. It is a tough conversation to be had with them, but it is a must, that they will at some point in their lives face racism.

I was talking more in general about interracial dating, not so much kids that would be later down the line for a said couple, to discuss. i also know in those closed communities, it is assumed and expected there will be marriage and kids, but again, that should be up to the said couple to discuss for themselves.

 

[Summerred]

Oh yes, I am not saying we should ignore stuff, but we cannot let racism stop people from getting together, but biracial kids do face some cruel challenges, where they can end up not being accepted by either community. It is a tough conversation to be had with them, but it is a must, that they will at some point in their lives face racism.

I am also well aware of white privilege, and how it can be destructive for all.

I think If the WW is aware of white privilege or even if she isn't but she want educated herself about it and learn how she can be an allie then it's a good start. The real point is if she is ready to make the relationship work despite of how the society will be unfair with her partner and kids. It's not gonna be an easy ride but i believe it's possible, just like a long distance relationship can work with some couples when they both really want It and are ready to make some sacrifice and work hard to make this last. Every relationship is tested in some point to know if this can make or break. I will say that an IR just is tested more than the usual relationship but sometimes this can make the relationship more strong. A least today even with some issues BM/WW have things more easy compared with what the old BM/WW couples had to face in the past.

 

[bodhesatva]

Now about the attraction between BM and WW honestly i just feel like this is a problem to people who seem afraid of the Idea of a new wave of biracial kids. When people see this couples together they think that in the future they will bring more biracial kids and this is "problematic".
I find weird that in the past not so far away people weren't allowed to have IR, they had to fight for this freedom and now that they don't have an excuse to push BM and WW away from each other they try to find another way using some mind control narrative to make this pair feel bad or ashamed of their attraction for each other, like if It was almost a hate crime against your community if you enjoy someone from another race.
I bring this back from Wikipedia when someone try to put down relationship or marriage between black and white people.

View attachment 18178
I know that in this particular situation the story was about a WM/BW couple but it's not like BM/WW was less hated by the white society during that time.
There is a reason why this was an issue in the past, a reason why the state tried to dictate who people should date/married based on their race and the reason was white supremacy who still is a thing and probably never will disapear. If after all this years someone still try to dictate others people relationship based on their race, i just feel like this person is supporting white supremacy while try frame this opinion like some black empowerment act.

I actually feel like there is a sort of spectrum of taboo-ness in interracial relationships through most of American history -- although all such relationships have faced serious opposition, and I don't want to suggest otherwise, some have faced stiffer opposition than others. For instance, I think in the modern era at least, white men dating/marrying Asian women is pretty darn safe and produces very little pushback. White men have controlled American culture for most of its history, so while WM/XF can face pushback, white guys tend to be less offended by interracial baby-making when it is they who get to do it.

And with that in mind, I think black men loving white women has historically been the most socially unacceptable, taboo coupling in America. A white man who had children by a black slave in the late 1700s would have gotten in trouble, for sure (I'm sure most of us know Thomas Jefferson had children with Sally Hemmings, a black slave, and it was indeed a scandal even in his own time). But a white woman having children with a black man back then? "Scandal" doesn't even come close to describing it. Women were outcast for it. Killed. Disowned by family in ways that Thomas Jefferson never would have dreamed of. And as bad as white women had it, black men could get hung or beaten to death just for looking at white women the wrong way.

So while all interracial relationships have been taboo, none has been more taboo than white women loving black men. I don't even think I should use the past tense: it's pretty clear that a lot of white guys are *still* hung up on it.

 

[Peach State Scholar]

I actually feel like there is a sort of spectrum of taboo-ness in interracial relationships through most of American history -- although all such relationships have faced serious opposition, and I don't want to suggest otherwise, some have faced stiffer opposition than others. For instance, I think in the modern era at least, white men dating/marrying Asian women is pretty darn safe and produces very little pushback. White men have controlled American culture for most of its history, so while WM/XF can face pushback, white guys tend to be less offended by interracial baby-making when it is they who get to do it.

And with that in mind, I think black men loving white women has historically been the most socially unacceptable, taboo coupling in America. A white man who had children by a black slave in the late 1700s would have gotten in trouble, for sure (I'm sure most of us know Thomas Jefferson had children with Sally Hemmings, a black slave, and it was indeed a scandal even in his own time). But a white woman having children with a black man back then? "Scandal" doesn't even come close to describing it. Women were outcast for it. Killed. Disowned by family in ways that Thomas Jefferson never would have dreamed of.

So while all interracial relationships have been taboo, none has been more taboo than white women loving black men. I don't even think I should use the past tense: it's pretty clear that a lot of white guys are *still* hung up on it.

Ah, 'Merica. And other countries too, but...ah, 'Merica.

 

[Summerred]

I actually feel like there is a sort of spectrum of taboo-ness in interracial relationships through most of American history -- although all such relationships have faced serious opposition, and I don't want to suggest otherwise, some have faced stiffer opposition than others. For instance, I think in the modern era at least, white men dating/marrying Asian women is pretty darn safe and produces very little pushback. White men have controlled American culture for most of its history, so while WM/XF can face pushback, white guys tend to be less offended by interracial baby-making when it is they who get to do it.

And with that in mind, I think black men loving white women has historically been the most socially unacceptable, taboo coupling in America. A white man who had children by a black slave in the late 1700s would have gotten in trouble, for sure (I'm sure most of us know Thomas Jefferson had children with Sally Hemmings, a black slave, and it was indeed a scandal even in his own time). But a white woman having children with a black man back then? "Scandal" doesn't even come close to describing it. Women were outcast for it. Killed. Disowned by family in ways that Thomas Jefferson never would have dreamed of. And as bad as white women had it, black men could get hung or beaten to death just for looking at white women the wrong way.

So while all interracial relationships have been taboo, none has been more taboo than white women loving black men. I don't even think I should use the past tense: it's pretty clear that a lot of white guys are *still* hung up on it.

This small clip from YouTube give the glimpse about what some people outside here think about IR.

 

[bodhesatva]

This small clip from YouTube give the glimpse about what some people outside here think about IR.

Great clip for insights! I think it's a good example of "horseshoe theory," where people on the far right believe something, and then as you go through the political spectrum it comes all the way back around to where far left people weirdly agree with the far right (although usually with very different reasoning).

There are far right people who are just plain racist, and who think race mixing is a sin, blah blah

But then I do hear about strong left people who think that any person of color who marries a white person must secretly hate their race and that they want to be "colonized" and blah blah.

Totally different reasoning, but the conclusion is the same: maybe all this race mixing is dangerous and bad.

I think the one point that your clip makes that I think is at least a bit valid is that our society tends to devalue the sexuality of Black women (and also Asian men, although that is not mentioned here.) I think that's bad, and I think it's important for us to work toward dispelling the sense that Black women can't be beautiful and feminine or that Asian men can't be handsome and manly.

But the idea that the solution to that problem is to limit or stop interracial marriage? Please.

 

[bodhesatva]

Here's a good example of a very leftist girl who is middle eastern by heritage, and who complains about "her men" dating white women, and how they are idiots for dating such boring women when she (and other middle eastern women) are so much better.

https://twitter.com/pkhakpour/status/1292303169171660800?lang=en

It's just positively dripping with insecurity and resentment, but she frames it as if she were a progressive fighting back against "colonialist" white women who are taking the men that rightfully belong to her.

This is what I mean by horsehoe theory! Totally different perspective from a racist white guy in 1960 who protested that "race mixing is evil" -- but in many ways she sounds an awful lot like them anyway.

 

[Summerred]

Great clip for insights! I think it's a good example of "horseshoe theory," where people on the far right believe something, and then as you go through the political spectrum it comes all the way back around to where far left people weirdly agree with the far right (although usually with very different reasoning).

There are far right people who are just plain racist, and who think race mixing is a sin, blah blah

But then I do hear about strong left people who think that any person of color who marries a white person must secretly hate their race and that they want to be "colonized" and blah blah.

Totally different reasoning, but the conclusion is the same: maybe all this race mixing is dangerous and bad.

I think the one point that your clip makes that I think is at least a bit valid is that our society tends to devalue the sexuality of Black women (and also Asian men, although that is not mentioned here.) I think that's bad, and I think it's important for us to work toward dispelling the sense that Black women can't be beautiful and feminine or that Asian men can't be handsome and manly.

But the idea that the solution to that problem is to limit or stop interracial marriage? Please.

Some things bother me with far left. The idea that BM only value BW if he is married with one. He can love and respect his mother, sister and all the BW in his life his entire life but if his wife is WW he is a self hater/traitor.
In that clip the guy complain about IR advertsing, something about how this could be potentially damaging BW. It almost sound like he think the media is doing so much promoting/pushing IR agenda and this is unfair because IR is minority. He don't see the other side, like how long there is IR in America and how long took the white media to start representing this couples and how this is significant to this couples and their mixed kids.
Also the part when the guy said that more than 80% of BM who make over 100.000 an year is married with BW.
Look, i don't have issue with BM/WW marriage staying behind BM/BW marriage. This isn't a competition about who comes in first place, but if the focus is a certain kind of BM with a more comfortable financial situation then this give some clues.
Of course this is just my POV, i could be wrong but look like they are indirectly hinting that BM who are more educated/make more money is the one who end up with BW, the others end up with WW. Also give me the idea that they care more about marriage choices from a BM if he have some social status because he is considered a high value man to society. So i wonder if their issue with IR is only about race (love your race and choosing a partner based on race to show your pride) or it's also about losing social status/economic power when a rich BM pick a partner from another race.

 

[Summerred]

Here's a good example of a very leftist girl who is middle eastern by heritage, and who complains about "her men" dating white women, and how they are idiots for dating such boring women when she (and other middle eastern women) are so much better.

https://twitter.com/pkhakpour/status/1292303169171660800?lang=en

It's just positively dripping with insecurity and resentment, but she frames it as if she were a progressive fighting back against "colonialist" white women who are taking the men that rightfully belong to her.

This is what I mean by horsehoe theory! Totally different perspective from a racist white guy in 1960 who protested that "race mixing is evil" -- but in many ways she sounds an awful lot like them anyway.

I wonder when this people say this things they don't even realize how they sound out loud. She sound bitter, resentful, self titled and seeing this men as a personal property.
She is accomplishing the opposite of what she seeks. You can't demand love from others using forms of intimidation. She is just giving more reasons to this men run away from her. I think nothing do better to activate the feeling of rebellion from guys than have people trying to command their personal life.
With this attitude she isn't helping herself, even if she frame this as a progressive act this won't make this men fall in love with her actions.

 

[Othello1967]

Some things bother me with far left. The idea that BM only value BW if he is married with one. He can love and respect his mother, sister and all the BW in his life his entire life but if his wife is WW he is a self hater/traitor.
In that clip the guy complain about IR advertsing, something about how this could be potentially damaging BW. It almost sound like he think the media is doing so much promoting/pushing IR agenda and this is unfair because IR is minority. He don't see the other side, like how long there is IR in America and how long took the white media to start representing this couples and how this is significant to this couples and their mixed kids.
Also the part when the guy said that more than 80% of BM who make over 100.000 an year is married with BW.
Look, i don't have issue with BM/WW marriage staying behind BM/BW marriage. This isn't a competition about who comes in first place, but if the focus is a certain kind of BM with a more comfortable financial situation then this give some clues.
Of course this is just my POV, i could be wrong but look like they are indirectly hinting that BM who are more educated/make more money is the one who end up with BW, the others end up with WW. Also give me the idea that they care more about marriage choices from a BM if he have some social status because he is considered a high value man to society. So i wonder if their issue with IR is only about race (love your race and choosing a partner based on race to show your pride) or it's also about losing social status/economic power when a rich BM pick a partner from another race.

I think what`s happening is people putting IR, particularly bm/ww, within a narrow box. People date/marry within their race for different reasons. Not all of those reasons are for love. Maybe we should start seeing IR in the same way.

 

[Othello1967]

Here's a good example of a very leftist girl who is middle eastern by heritage, and who complains about "her men" dating white women, and how they are idiots for dating such boring women when she (and other middle eastern women) are so much better.

https://twitter.com/pkhakpour/status/1292303169171660800?lang=en

It's just positively dripping with insecurity and resentment, but she frames it as if she were a progressive fighting back against "colonialist" white women who are taking the men that rightfully belong to her.

This is what I mean by horsehoe theory! Totally different perspective from a racist white guy in 1960 who protested that "race mixing is evil" -- but in many ways she sounds an awful lot like them anyway.

The highlighted says it all.

 

[Summerred]

I think what`s happening is people putting IR, particularly bm/ww, within a narrow box. People date/marry within their race for different reasons. Not all of those reasons are for love. Maybe we should start seeing IR in the same way.

I think people here know that couples don't always date/marry for love, the love can be there but isn't always the only reason and it's fine, i wouldn't hold this against anyone, this happen in IR or not. I just don't buy the idea that only dating your own race is the perfect example of pure love, the love that don't seek any advantages because people from every race always see the social status and this make someone have more high value according with society standart, just like when someone have a pretty face and good body always get more attention and usually get more dating options. It's a human behavior.

 

[Donaldintx]

I'd like to know if anyone else has had a similar experience to me:

I've found that when I express to friends in a conversational/casual way that I'm attracted to black men, I'm met with jokes or shock or questions. The general assumption from society seems to be that it's a sexual perversion, that it's all about big black dicks, that it's some sort of joke. It's never just accepted as an ok/normal thing.

My good friends know about my preferences and they're totally fine with it - but there are still jokes when it comes up, or it's assumed that I'll have the hots for any black man that crosses our paths, regardless of whether I find him attractive or not.

I'm even afraid to tell a black guy that I may be dating that I prefer black men, in case he thinks it's weird or a fetish and I'm sexualising him.

Personally, my love for black men feels natural and pure and the LAST thing it feels to me is dirty or perverted. I just hate the assumption that if I like black guys, it must be about big dicks


Has anyone else had that kind of reception?

My former wife had a strong interest in black men and I thought it was wierd. When she told a gf she was met with bad jokes. The small company she works for is black owned and most employees are black. She liked them, men and women, respected them and thats how she began to think about having a relationship with a divorced black man there. When she told me he ad=sked her for a date I said well if you want to go I will not object. Well, as you may have guessed they are now married.

 

[Madeleine]

My former wife had a strong interest in black men and I thought it was wierd. When she told a gf she was met with bad jokes. The small company she works for is black owned and most employees are black. She liked them, men and women, respected them and thats how she began to think about having a relationship with a divorced black man there. When she told me he ad=sked her for a date I said well if you want to go I will not object. Well, as you may have guessed they are now married.

Why would you not object to your wife going on a date, regardless of colour? Except the marriage is already ruined and you don’t care.