Feeling Guilty About Attraction to White Women?

I

IHaveNoIdea

New Member
I'm somewhat new to interracial dating with the exception of a couple Hispanic women that I dated many years ago with nothing serious coming out of it. Anyway, I have always had an attraction for white women but never acted on it. I attribute this to my upbringing and having parents and family members that constantly reminded me that black people need to stick together.

I've noticed as the years go by that I am losing attraction towards black women, and it almost to the point where I rarely meet a black woman that can summon those feelings. I definitely can't see myself at this time in my life having a long term relationship with a black woman. I am not saying this to bash black women or put all of them in a negative light, I'm just being honest and stating my reality.

Although I am attracted to white women, a part of me feels guilty for having this attraction. Is this normal? Maybe I feel this way because I'm constantly being told there are lots of black women available for relationships, and that it is supposed to be easy pickings for someone like me. This might be the case but I don't want to end up settling for what I don't want in life which seems to be the path many people follow for sake of conformity. I just don't know. Have any of you guys gone through a period where you felt guilty for either wanting a relationship with a white women or being in one?
 
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hello & welcome; i realize you didn't ask, but i've never felt guilty for being attracted to any man. the way i feel about a person is simply, for me, a matter of fact - it is what it is, no more & no less :smt049
 
There have been moments where I have. Two nights ago my baby cousin asked me if I thought bw were ugly and said absolutely not. All woman can be beautiful no matter what their race. She then said how come her whole life why have I only brought ww around. I'm not gonna lie that shit really stung. I'm one of the few positive male influences in her life and what does it say to her that I never date bw. Black isn't beautiful? I'm self loathing? I'm probably never going to shake that feeling but you have to do what feels right or you'll never have a relationship that can survive.
 
I can understand what you are saying.....in the end it is about being happy. I do however will say that I believe all women are beautiful and should be looked upon that way. also it is a fetter of the mind when people tell you that you should stick to your own. I say fuck that !!! yes to a point there is loyalty to your demographic race but in the end your loyalty is to yourself. loyalty to a race doesnt keep your bed warm.

note: when I say loyalty to your race I am saying in a civil rights way....besides when black people stand up against racism every race, religion, sex and handicap benefits. oppression against any human being is oppression against all.
 
andrae09 said:
There have been moments where I have. Two nights ago my baby cousin asked me if I thought bw were ugly and said absolutely not. All woman can be beautiful no matter what their race. She then said how come her whole life why have I only brought ww around. I'm not gonna lie that shit really stung. I'm one of the few positive male influences in her life and what does it say to her that I never date bw. Black isn't beautiful? I'm self loathing? I'm probably never going to shake that feeling but you have to do what feels right or you'll never have a relationship that can survive.
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that is a hard thing to respond to. I guess I would probably stated that all black women are beautiful as well as other women of other races. I just happen to meet white women who like my personality.
 
andrae09 said:
There have been moments where I have. Two nights ago my baby cousin asked me if I thought bw were ugly and said absolutely not. All woman can be beautiful no matter what their race. She then said how come her whole life why have I only brought ww around. I'm not gonna lie that shit really stung. I'm one of the few positive male influences in her life and what does it say to her that I never date bw. Black isn't beautiful? I'm self loathing? I'm probably never going to shake that feeling but you have to do what feels right or you'll never have a relationship that can survive.
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this is why i dont get the brothas, that flat-out have problems with BW. Cuz, dont you know when you pass your seed, your baby girl will probably have brown skin? Same goes for the ones that hate white guys. Cuz, dont you know your son might end up looking white?

I just dont get this shit. Maybe some people arent really thinking about relationships and having kids with WW. Maybe this shit is all about the sex afterall.

SMDH
 
pettyofficerj said:
this is why i dont get the brothas, that flat-out have problems with BW. Cuz, dont you know when you pass your seed, your baby girl will probably have brown skin? Same goes for the ones that hate white guys. Cuz, dont you know your son might end up looking white?

I just dont get this shit. Maybe some people arent really thinking about relationships and having kids with WW. Maybe this shit is all about the sex afterall.

SMDH
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2 thumbs up!!! :smt052
 
I wont lie,I have felt guilty from time to time and for the same reason you stated. I too grew up in a family that stressed unity among eachother and I also realized on my own that we need to be more united when it comes to certain things.

As time went on I managed to balance my feelings,its part of what maturing as a BM is about. We gotta manage our emotions and use more rationale.

I know that we still live in this racist society and need to stick together but we should not let that need manifest into something that divides us from these beautiful WW.

So I am more than willing to unite with Black women and men when the times comes to move for a positive goal,but our unity should not manifest into a hatred of ALL white people.

So with that said brotha,I am more than willing to come together with you AND the Ww you may be with when the time comes.

When you see the lovely ladies that come to this site like LiquidSwords,Tarshi (and her twins),DayDream16,InnerBeauty,Whikle,Jennymich,Robina and the loads of other women,you will see that the ignorant actions of a few White and black people should not separate us from the lovely women and more I just mentioned.

P.S. Feel free to make friends with any of the ladies on this site,I think all but one will be warm to you. But please dont be more than friends with ThickShawty,she's ALL MINE.
 
IHaveNoIdea said:
I'm somewhat new to interracial dating with the exception of a couple Hispanic women that I dated many years ago with nothing serious coming out of it. Anyway, I have always had an attraction for white women but never acted on it. I attribute this to my upbringing and having parents and family members that constantly reminded me that black people need to stick together.

I've noticed as the years go by that I am losing attraction towards black women, and it almost to the point where I rarely meet a black woman that can summon those feelings. I definitely can't see myself at this time in my life having a long term relationship with a black woman. I am not saying this to bash black women or put all of them in a negative light, I'm just being honest and stating my reality.

Although I am attracted to white women, a part of me feels guilty for having this attraction. Is this normal? Maybe I feel this way because I'm constantly being told there are lots of black women available for relationships, and that it is supposed to be easy pickings for someone like me. This might be the case but I don't want to end up settling for what I don't want in life which seems to be the path many people follow for sake of conformity. I just don't know. Have any of you guys gone through a period where you felt guilty for either wanting a relationship with a white women or being in one?
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why would it be normal and why would you feel guilty, what did you do wrong?
 
pettyofficerj said:
this is why i dont get the brothas, that flat-out have problems with BW. Cuz, dont you know when you pass your seed, your baby girl will probably have brown skin? Same goes for the ones that hate white guys. Cuz, dont you know your son might end up looking white?

I just dont get this shit. Maybe some people arent really thinking about relationships and having kids with WW. Maybe this shit is all about the sex afterall.

SMDH
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Some people can't let go of the pain fame.
 
Getting attracted to any human being whether on Earth or in any other planet is all about the mind frame. If my foundational values dictate ideas contrary to what my mind and heart seem to hold good or rather pleasing to me, then guilt among other whirlwinds of emotions can really bash me to emotional fragments.
Salvation may come from exposure and basic positive education that eventually frees the mind and allows it to embrace the environmental dynamics with shear dexterity...including getting attracted to WW, BW, AW (Asian Women) etc.
 
IHaveNoIdea said:
I'm somewhat new to interracial dating with the exception of a couple Hispanic women that I dated many years ago with nothing serious coming out of it. Anyway, I have always had an attraction for white women but never acted on it. I attribute this to my upbringing and having parents and family members that constantly reminded me that black people need to stick together.

I've noticed as the years go by that I am losing attraction towards black women, and it almost to the point where I rarely meet a black woman that can summon those feelings. I definitely can't see myself at this time in my life having a long term relationship with a black woman. I am not saying this to bash black women or put all of them in a negative light, I'm just being honest and stating my reality.

Although I am attracted to white women, a part of me feels guilty for having this attraction. Is this normal? Maybe I feel this way because I'm constantly being told there are lots of black women available for relationships, and that it is supposed to be easy pickings for someone like me. This might be the case but I don't want to end up settling for what I don't want in life which seems to be the path many people follow for sake of conformity. I just don't know. Have any of you guys gone through a period where you felt guilty for either wanting a relationship with a white women or being in one?
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You best believe BW that date IR never go through bullshit like this...nor do they have to explain why they don't date Brothers.

BM seem to be the only ones booking reservations for the guilt trip.
 
desreveRsIgnitirW said:
.

When you see the lovely ladies that come to this site like LiquidSwords,Tarshi (and her twins),DayDream16,InnerBeauty,Whikle,Jennymich,Robina and the loads of other women,you will see that the ignorant actions of a few White and black people should not separate us from the lovely women and more I just mentioned.

P.S. Feel free to make friends with any of the ladies on this site,I think all but one will be warm to you. But please dont be more than friends with ThickShawty,she's ALL MINE.
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Agreed.


By the way, m8...



"all but one"...


Who's the one dissenter here?


Just curious..



Yours Truly can be, in all confidentiality, reached with answer to said query at:



OpinionsCartoonStudios@Yahoo.Co.UK
 
I feel no guilt at all about my attraction. I like all women but prefer WW of the same social class and with similar values. I realize that many people may not understand the attraction but I am old enough to not lose sleep over it.
 
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