Age differences between partners

Age really is just a number, it depends on the mental maturity of the individual..

There is 10 years between myself and my OH (I am 25 and he is 35).. we get along just fine, and have done for the last 5 years :)

You really shouldn't worry about it if she is mature enough :)
 
XXX said:
I'm in my late 20's now. There's this white chick who's been putting the moves on me (well tbh I've been putting them on her and feeling real guilty about it).

Thing is, she's 19. Now I know a lot of folks say that age is just a number, but for some reason or other it sorta bothers me.

Problem is, she's great. I mean I've spent quite some time fooling around with women - but I never felt the same spark I do as with this one. She really does make me feel all warm and fuzzy. Not like any other girl has before.

I'd hate to be the guy in his 40's who's happy to date 30-yr olds, coz then the 10-year age gap would come back to haunt me. I mean, if I date 30 yr olds when I'm 40 - why the hell shouldn't I date a 19yr old when I'm still young myself? Especially given that this one is really special in a way that others are not.


I don't know people. What do you guys think?

You ever had a serious relationship with someone where there was a (possibly considerable) age-gap? If it's right should I just say F it and go for it?
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Don't feel guilty about it. I'm not even in the mood to get into society's retarded, and backwards view about consensual, genuine affection between people from different age groups being perverted or 'exploitative'. If a 40 year old falls in love with a 20 year old, let them be.

Besides, you're not that much older than she is. You belong, more or less, to the same demographic.
 
ten years is nothing at all. i think when it gets into teenage years, for some reason it freaks us out, but 19 isn't 14 lol. She's a grown up for goodness sake.
If you want to be together, just do it!
There was almost a ten year gap between me and my ex, and there is the exact same difference between me and my current fella, going the other way (my ex was younger, my man is older), but it didn't and doesn't matter at all.
My ex was a lunatic, nothing to do with his age lol, and me and my man just get on so well that its not even noticed that he's a little bit older than me.
 
Age and maturity are not the same thing.
For my age -26- I am quite mature , and I would like for my partner to be around a similar maturity level, which is rare in men my age or younger,but not impossible.
My current relationship is with someone only one year and 3 months older than me.
The biggest age gap I've ever had in a relationship was 16 years when I was 21 and the guy was 37. Despite his age he was not that mature though.
 
I think it depends on, what you are seeking.. Age is not just a number- it is experience, Change of life goals and many other things.

If you are just seeking someone for your sexual life then go for it, but if you search someone to share your life with- then I assume you have to go a bit deeper. And age is one factor you cannot neglect, over my decades I was able to observe what was going on with me. In my twenties I've had totally different goals than I have today in my fourties. Your body, your mind and your eyes are changed- not only how you look like, also how you look at people and your own life.

I am not less curious but I am not that easy to play with as I was in my younger ages and when I see women in their twenties- it's like a deja vu- a mirror of the past that shows me the differences in thinking, acting and feeling.

That is not offensive, I find it charming, very attractive- it's just an observation
 
christine dubois said:
I think it depends on, what you are seeking.. Age is not just a number- it is experience, Change of life goals and many other things.

If you are just seeking someone for your sexual life then go for it, but if you search someone to share your life with- then I assume you have to go a bit deeper. And age is one factor you cannot neglect, over my decades I was able to observe what was going on with me. In my twenties I've had totally different goals than I have today in my fourties. Your body, your mind and your eyes are changed- not only how you look like, also how you look at people and your own life.

I am not less curious but I am not that easy to play with as I was in my younger ages and when I see women in their twenties- it's like a deja vu- a mirror of the past that shows me the differences in thinking, acting and feeling.

That is not offensive, I find it charming, very attractive- it's just an observation
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Great post but uh you in your 40s? Puhleaze, do you really expect me to believe that with those youthful looks?
 
I have to admit, I've never dated *thinks*...nope. Never dated a guy younger than myself. I don't count my hs boyfriend, only because I don't really call that "dating". That to me was puppy love...things did get thick towards the end, but probably too much too soon for him, perhaps that's why he cheated on me...but in his defense I did leave for bootcamp...

ANYWAY...I think I agree with Christine. Life has a way of changing a person. Doesn't necessarily equal years/age, since people can have life experiences/trials/children/etc. at a younger age...but as a woman, I've been married, been through a bad relationship, wasted years on bad relationships that have soured my heart. I'm not going to take my chances wasting more time away with some young buck still sorting his life out. I want someone who knows what he wants in life and is ready to potentially settle down (though, honestly the idea of this scares me)...I want someone who has been working on his goals and has his dreams lined up. Someone w/ a good job who is financially stable and can take care of himself and his responsibilities. Potentially spoil me a little.

to play with...no problem. But then again, my son is going to be 19 this year...so too young he will remind me of my son. I am just looking for a deeper level connection, not just a sexual relationship.
 
For me, eight years is my limit for the time being. But when I hit my 30's, I'll just go up to nine years difference if I'm dating somebody younger. Why? It'll be too much for me to handle.

So, if I were to date someone older? Well, the ten year difference applies. :)
 
Cherok33 said:
I have to admit, I've never dated *thinks*...nope. Never dated a guy younger than myself. I don't count my hs boyfriend, only because I don't really call that "dating". That to me was puppy love...things did get thick towards the end, but probably too much too soon for him, perhaps that's why he cheated on me...but in his defense I did leave for bootcamp...

ANYWAY...I think I agree with Christine. Life has a way of changing a person. Doesn't necessarily equal years/age, since people can have life experiences/trials/children/etc. at a younger age...but as a woman, I've been married, been through a bad relationship, wasted years on bad relationships that have soured my heart. I'm not going to take my chances wasting more time away with some young buck still sorting his life out. I want someone who knows what he wants in life and is ready to potentially settle down (though, honestly the idea of this scares me)...I want someone who has been working on his goals and has his dreams lined up. Someone w/ a good job who is financially stable and can take care of himself and his responsibilities. Potentially spoil me a little.

to play with...no problem. But then again, my son is going to be 19 this year...so too young he will remind me of my son. I am just looking for a deeper level connection, not just a sexual relationship.
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Once I hit that powerball we riding off into the sunset my queen.
 
4north1side2 said:
Great post but uh you in your 40s? Puhleaze, do you really expect me to believe that with those youthful looks?
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you are sweet..but yes, believe me. Most people are shocked- they assume I am in my 30's

Cherok33 said:
I have to admit, I've never dated *thinks*...nope. Never dated a guy younger than myself. I don't count my hs boyfriend, only because I don't really call that "dating". That to me was puppy love...things did get thick towards the end, but probably too much too soon for him, perhaps that's why he cheated on me...but in his defense I did leave for bootcamp...

ANYWAY...I think I agree with Christine. Life has a way of changing a person. Doesn't necessarily equal years/age, since people can have life experiences/trials/children/etc. at a younger age...but as a woman, I've been married, been through a bad relationship, wasted years on bad relationships that have soured my heart. I'm not going to take my chances wasting more time away with some young buck still sorting his life out. I want someone who knows what he wants in life and is ready to potentially settle down (though, honestly the idea of this scares me)...I want someone who has been working on his goals and has his dreams lined up. Someone w/ a good job who is financially stable and can take care of himself and his responsibilities. Potentially spoil me a little.

to play with...no problem. But then again, my son is going to be 19 this year...so too young he will remind me of my son. I am just looking for a deeper level connection, not just a sexual relationship.
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Great post, when you have kids yourself or in your family like me( my oldest nephew becomes 30 this year) you feel responsibility for this age. It makes it difficult to feel something else for a man in this age, although I know he is grown-up.
 
Majestic Saint said:
For me, eight years is my limit for the time being. But when I hit my 30's, I'll just go up to nine years difference if I'm dating somebody younger. Why? It'll be too much for me to handle.

So, if I were to date someone older? Well, the ten year difference applies. :)
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Agree with this. 8 years sounds about right.....
 
I'd go for it, you don't want to miss the chance, she could possibly be the one if she makes you feel all "warm and fuzzy" inside.
 
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