Advancing with coworker. Not sure how to proceed.

B

blackbrah

Well-Known Member
So I work in a different business segment with this woman at work. I assume she's mid 30s. She tends to be very friendly with everyone in general. It is promoted in our environment.

I've noticed her make a comment a few months ago when she saw me outside of work. "I thought it was you but when I saw you from the back (referring to my butt) I knew it was you". I thought that was funny.

Well I got her back one time when she had a meal. I told her that it would go straight to her butt. It made her a bit self conscious but a few days later I was telling her it was all playful and reminded her what she said to me.

The next few days I notice her notice me a bit more than usual. For example when I was on the second floor she looked up and smiled at me, or making small glances to see me. Busy eyes.

One time I saw her get food. She commented "I did my butt exercises this morning ;)" I glanced back being a little cheeky and said "oh really? "

So I advanced with her one day at work and she start talking about getting on the right track with her diet and her exercises...I told her I find her really attractive. She was taken away and said "really?" because it was sincere and thanked me. I said we should do something sometime.

I tried to get her # but her friend came around and she said that they had to talk about some stuff...not sure if she was trying to deflect awkwardness or not interested or what. so I don't know how to proceed. Any advice appreciated
 
blackbrah said:
I tried to get her # but her friend came around and she said that they had to talk about some stuff...not sure if she was trying to deflect awkwardness or not interested or what. so I don't know how to proceed. Any advice appreciated
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She is not interested, trust me.

You are not interested in a conversation with HR regarding your company's sexual harassment policy either, trust me. Never make reference to a co-workers ass in a professional environment again.
 
satyr said:
She is not interested, trust me.

You are not interested in a conversation with HR regarding your company's sexual harassment policy either, trust me. Never make reference to a co-workers ass in a professional environment again.
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Yeah...agree with everyone else. Be careful w/ those personal comments at work. Flirting is one thing, but when you start naming body parts and so on, the signals get mixed and if someone else overhears, could mean trouble for you.
 
buglerroller said:
he likes to play with fire and isnt giving up on his goal to take down someone at work.
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That's not the case really. Our company is large and many people have relationships at work. The policy is so long as they are single (as in no infidelity) and they are not within your chain.

I'm not trying to get a notch under my belt. How are you inferring that from my questions? Most people date who's around.

That's a really rude assumption.

I appreciate the advice otherwise from you all.

buglerroller said:
i can understand if he doesn't work there anymore, but not while working there.
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Regarding that, I'm actually leaving that department entirely with my latest promotion/job transfer within the company.
 
blackbrah said:
That's not the case really. Our company is large and many people have relationships at work. The policy is so long as they are single (as in no infidelity) and they are not within your chain.

I'm not trying to get a notch under my belt. How are you inferring that from my questions? Most people date who's around.

That's a really rude assumption.

I appreciate the advice otherwise from you all.



Regarding that, I'm actually leaving that department entirely with my latest promotion/job transfer within the company.
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your question in this thread and a few others have lead me to believe you like to play with fire in the workplace is all.

when you leave the company, then you can hit her up... make as many female friends while at work if anything. get yourself a work wife and make sure she is the least attractive woman in the company. you will see results then.
 
buglerroller said:
your question in this thread and a few others have lead me to believe you like to play with fire in the workplace is all.

when you leave the company, then you can hit her up... make as many female friends while at work if anything. get yourself a work wife and make sure she is the least attractive woman in the company. you will see results then.
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A few others? You mean the one other thread where I asked about dating in the workplace overall? Really?

FYI I have never dated or attempted to date anyone at any of my workplace in my professional career. Not even a casual hookup which I would never do. Isn't a forum a medium to ask for advice?

Work wife hmm...now that's interesting. It's just that I work in a heavily technical field.
 
blackbrah said:
A few others? You mean the one other thread where I asked about dating in the workplace overall? Really?

FYI I have never dated or attempted to date anyone at any of my workplace in my professional career. Not even a casual hookup which I would never do. Isn't a forum a medium to ask for advice?

Work wife hmm...now that's interesting. It's just that I work in a heavily technical field.
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not trying to put you down, please dont take my posts as that. yes, i meant the other thread.

i work in a heavily technical field as well, i was lucky at my last job that the marketing team was in our same building. the guys at work used to ask me why i choose the lady i did to be my work wife and it was simple. she was the least attractive woman out of a group of dimes and would always say amazing things about me to the others. it helped that she had a sweet and captivating personality. the funniest part was when she brought her husband to a work function and he got a little jealous i was the work husband she always spoke about.
 
blackbrah said:
So I work in a different business segment with this woman at work. I assume she's mid 30s. She tends to be very friendly with everyone in general. It is promoted in our environment.

I've noticed her make a comment a few months ago when she saw me outside of work. "I thought it was you but when I saw you from the back (referring to my butt) I knew it was you". I thought that was funny.

Well I got her back one time when she had a meal. I told her that it would go straight to her butt. It made her a bit self conscious but a few days later I was telling her it was all playful and reminded her what she said to me.

The next few days I notice her notice me a bit more than usual. For example when I was on the second floor she looked up and smiled at me, or making small glances to see me. Busy eyes.

One time I saw her get food. She commented "I did my butt exercises this morning ;)" I glanced back being a little cheeky and said "oh really? "

So I advanced with her one day at work and she start talking about getting on the right track with her diet and her exercises...I told her I find her really attractive. She was taken away and said "really?" because it was sincere and thanked me. I said we should do something sometime.

I tried to get her # but her friend came around and she said that they had to talk about some stuff...not sure if she was trying to deflect awkwardness or not interested or what. so I don't know how to proceed. Any advice appreciated
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Ain't nothing wrong with work relationships, go for it. I think your thinking way to much into it, just keep up with the light flirtiness and let it grow from their.
 
buglerroller said:
not trying to put you down, please dont take my posts as that. yes, i meant the other thread.

i work in a heavily technical field as well, i was lucky at my last job that the marketing team was in our same building. the guys at work used to ask me why i choose the lady i did to be my work wife and it was simple. she was the least attractive woman out of a group of dimes and would always say amazing things about me to the others. it helped that she had a sweet and captivating personality. the funniest part was when she brought her husband to a work function and he got a little jealous i was the work husband she always spoke about.
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Ah gotcha. work wife lol funny concept though.

4north1side2 said:
Ain't nothing wrong with work relationships, go for it. I think your thinking way to much into it, just keep up with the light flirtiness and let it grow from their.
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I'm a bit too cerebral if you know me IRL :P
 
I'd say that this is your cue to back off. But, if you want to pursue this possibility, proceed slowly and with caution. If things do not work out, both of you will be able to come out with their dignity intact.
 
Gorath said:
I'd say that this is your cue to back off. But, if you want to pursue this possibility, proceed slowly and with caution. If things do not work out, both of you will be able to come out with their dignity intact.
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FYI she's a Mormon but she always makes those inviting comments to me and looks. People know I'm an avid fitness enthusiast and are inspired by me. I recall her telling me that she wanted to work her ass. I didn't even provoke or entertain that comment so WTF.

Anyways I'm moving to another department in three weeks so it's cool.
 
blackbrah said:
FYI she's a Mormon but she always makes those inviting comments to me and looks. People know I'm an avid fitness enthusiast and are inspired by me. I recall her telling me that she wanted to work her ass. I didn't even provoke or entertain that comment so WTF.

Anyways I'm moving to another department in three weeks so it's cool.
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If she refers to her backside as ass, I don't think she is a Mormon. But, then again, even they stray from the path sometimes.
 
Gorath said:
If she refers to her backside as ass, I don't think she is a Mormon. But, then again, even they stray from the path sometimes.
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She could be a Jehovah's Witness haha. She even recommended me to drink a Hot Toddy for my throat.

Anyways I'm in different departments now.
 
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