Going White

The Dark King said:
You apparently aren't paying attention. Had she mentioned weight you'd want her head lol
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You've been on here for years. How many swirling BW have been here in that same time to constantly complain of the plight of BW/WM?

You know I love to pick on you. :p
 
Ches said:
You've been on here for years. How many swirling BW have been here in that same time to constantly complain of the plight of BW/WM?

You know I love to pick on you. :p
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Lol well you're right there hasn't been that many but this particular poster does love to constantly bring that pov. I'm not saying she shouldn't but if I don't agree I'll say something. Much like we've disagreed about weight topics but I've never told you to or what not to say we just disagree.
 
The Dark King said:
Lol well you're right there hasn't been that many but this particular poster does love to constantly bring that pov. I'm not saying she shouldn't but if I don't agree I'll say something. Much like we've disagreed about weight topics but I've never told you to or what not to say we just disagree.
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Nothing wrong with disagreeing. The world would be pretty vanilla if we all agreed. We'd die of sheer boredom.
 
The Dark King said:
Lol well you're right there hasn't been that many but this particular poster does love to constantly bring that pov. I'm not saying she shouldn't but if I don't agree I'll say something. Much like we've disagreed about weight topics but I've never told you to or what not to say we just disagree.
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*DAPS*

I feel you.
 
The Dark King said:
That's a good joke tell another. There are little to no societal challenges for wm/bw relationships the fake koombiyah we're in it together shit is really patronizing.
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While I hesitate in posting a response, I feel that it is important to express my point of view as long as it is welcome in this forum.

My outlook and opinions may seem to be "kumbaya" to some (I am from SoCal after all and raised amongst free thinkers) but my intent is genuine. It is not my nature to be patronizing.

I have always loved the hear people's stories and learn about their journeys/struggles/hopes/fears/ambitions. It comes from a place of genuine curiosity and desire to understand the lives of others from a perspective which I will never personally experience. It has always been important for me to expand my view of the world beyond my own life experiences.

So I apologize if my presence is a disturbance but I thought that I would be able to have great, open conversations on this board regarding love, family, community, society and IRRs regardless of the race/color/gender combination.
 
Apollonia said:
While I hesitate in posting a response, I feel that it is important to express my point of view as long as it is welcome in this forum.

My outlook and opinions may seem to be "kumbaya" to some (I am from SoCal after all and raised amongst free thinkers) but my intent is genuine. It is not my nature to be patronizing.

I have always loved the hear people's stories and learn about their journeys/struggles/hopes/fears/ambitions. It comes from a place of genuine curiosity and desire to understand the lives of others from a perspective which I will never personally experience. It has always been important for me to expand my view of the world beyond my own life experiences.

So I apologize if my presence is a disturbance but I thought that I would be able to have great, open conversations on this board regarding love, family, community, society and IRRs regardless of the race/color/gender combination.
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I think everywhere you go in life (internet included), unless you're a complete pushover, you'll inevitably come across people who aren't fans of yours. It seems like you have a strong enough sense of self to know that what strangers think of you doesn't hold an ounce of worth. You ARE welcome here IMO and I think its incredibly sad that on a site that preaches equality/fairness/acceptance, you're being shown none of those things. You haven't been patronizing, and I don't understand the kumbaya comment. As a bw, I'm sure you respect the fact that racism still exists, but that doesn't mean we have to see bad in everything. It is possible to be positive and realistic at the same time.

From what I've seen, you've been nothing but respectful towards BM/WW relationships and IR in general, so why on earth wouldn't you be welcome here? :smt017 Personally, I hope you continue to post because I believe the majority of the members here appreciate your respectful and understanding tone.

Just remember...if the monster growls too loudly, retreat to the castle mama. :freehug:
 
RaiderLL said:
I think everywhere you go in life (internet included), unless you're a complete pushover, you'll inevitably come across people who aren't fans of yours. It seems like you have a strong enough sense of self to know that what strangers think of you doesn't hold an ounce of worth. You ARE welcome here IMO and I think its incredibly sad that on a site that preaches equality/fairness/acceptance, you're being shown none of those things. You haven't been patronizing, and I don't understand the kumbaya comment. As a bw, I'm sure you respect the fact that racism still exists, but that doesn't mean we have to see bad in everything. It is possible to be positive and realistic at the same time.

From what I've seen, you've been nothing but respectful towards BM/WW relationships and IR in general, so why on earth wouldn't you be welcome here? :smt017 Personally, I hope you continue to post because I believe the majority of the members here appreciate your respectful and understanding tone.

Just remember...if the monster growls too loudly, retreat to the castle mama. :freehug:
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100% cosign this!
 
RaiderLL said:
I think everywhere you go in life (internet included), unless you're a complete pushover, you'll inevitably come across people who aren't fans of yours. It seems like you have a strong enough sense of self to know that what strangers think of you doesn't hold an ounce of worth. You ARE welcome here IMO and I think its incredibly sad that on a site that preaches equality/fairness/acceptance, you're being shown none of those things. You haven't been patronizing, and I don't understand the kumbaya comment. As a bw, I'm sure you respect the fact that racism still exists, but that doesn't mean we have to see bad in everything. It is possible to be positive and realistic at the same time.

From what I've seen, you've been nothing but respectful towards BM/WW relationships and IR in general, so why on earth wouldn't you be welcome here? :smt017 Personally, I hope you continue to post because I believe the majority of the members here appreciate your respectful and understanding tone.

Just remember...if the monster growls too loudly, retreat to the castle, mama stick your fingers in your ears and sing "La, la, la, la" at the top of your lungs. :freehug:
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Fixed.
 
Apollonia said:
While I hesitate in posting a response, I feel that it is important to express my point of view as long as it is welcome in this forum.

My outlook and opinions may seem to be "kumbaya" to some (I am from SoCal after all and raised amongst free thinkers) but my intent is genuine. It is not my nature to be patronizing.

I have always loved the hear people's stories and learn about their journeys/struggles/hopes/fears/ambitions. It comes from a place of genuine curiosity and desire to understand the lives of others from a perspective which I will never personally experience. It has always been important for me to expand my view of the world beyond my own life experiences.

So I apologize if my presence is a disturbance but I thought that I would be able to have great, open conversations on this board regarding love, family, community, society and IRRs regardless of the race/color/gender combination.
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I don't care if you post your experiences exercise your free speech all you want. My issue is the constant side by side conflation as if its the same thing. Do you think ww and bw share the same struggle? Would you constantly want to hear how bad they have it? Especially if it is things you don't see supported in everyday life. More importantly would it be something you'd want to hear on an Ebony website? Do you get what I'm saying now?
I'm really not trying to mean but it's something that needed to be pointed out.
 
Apollonia said:
While I hesitate in posting a response, I feel that it is important to express my point of view as long as it is welcome in this forum.

My outlook and opinions may seem to be "kumbaya" to some (I am from SoCal after all and raised amongst free thinkers) but my intent is genuine. It is not my nature to be patronizing.

I have always loved the hear people's stories and learn about their journeys/struggles/hopes/fears/ambitions. It comes from a place of genuine curiosity and desire to understand the lives of others from a perspective which I will never personally experience. It has always been important for me to expand my view of the world beyond my own life experiences.

So I apologize if my presence is a disturbance but I thought that I would be able to have great, open conversations on this board regarding love, family, community, society and IRRs regardless of the race/color/gender combination.
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1 didnt know u were bw.
2 u r wonderful and respectful
3 u r more than welcome to stay
4 dont worry bout bucket head
5 if u disrepect then u have to go.
 
The Dark King said:
I don't care if you post your experiences exercise your free speech all you want. My issue is the constant side by side conflation as if its the same thing. Do you think ww and bw share the same struggle? Would you constantly want to hear how bad they have it? Especially if it is things you don't see supported in everyday life. More importantly would it be something you'd want to hear on an Ebony website? Do you get what I'm saying now?
I'm really not trying to mean but it's something that needed to be pointed out.
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The commonalities between women are far more similar than not regardless of race/color/ethnicity.

I do not require that my white girlfriends prove to me how deeply something pains or bothers them before we have discussions. My role as a friend is to be a good listener and supporter. I have no need to play the 'my pain is greater than your pain' game and neither do they. And in turn my friends do not require that they experience or see what I experience as a black women in order to listen to my concerns or provide support. Not seeing something "supported" in your everyday life does NOT mean that it is not occurring.

Based upon the tone of some posts, I get the feeling that many of you feel the concept of close relationships between black and white women are a foreign concept and that we are supposed to be mortal enemies of some sort. I have never not had deep relationships with white women in my life who either family, friends, sorority sisters, teachers, mentors, etc. One of my two best friends is a white woman (and I was her maid of honor). One of my favorite aunts (married to my uncle) is a white woman and her biracial daughter (my first cousin) is like a sister to me. And one of my mentors is a white women who has moved heaven and earth for me.

Everything in life is not black and white with rigid boundaries.
 
RaiderLL said:
I think everywhere you go in life (internet included), unless you're a complete pushover, you'll inevitably come across people who aren't fans of yours. It seems like you have a strong enough sense of self to know that what strangers think of you doesn't hold an ounce of worth. You ARE welcome here IMO and I think its incredibly sad that on a site that preaches equality/fairness/acceptance, you're being shown none of those things. You haven't been patronizing, and I don't understand the kumbaya comment. As a bw, I'm sure you respect the fact that racism still exists, but that doesn't mean we have to see bad in everything. It is possible to be positive and realistic at the same time.

From what I've seen, you've been nothing but respectful towards BM/WW relationships and IR in general, so why on earth wouldn't you be welcome here? :smt017 Personally, I hope you continue to post because I believe the majority of the members here appreciate your respectful and understanding tone.

Just remember...if the monster growls too loudly, retreat to the castle mama. :freehug:
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FG said:
100% cosign this!
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goodlove said:
1 didnt know u were bw.
2 u r wonderful and respectful
3 u r more than welcome to stay
4 dont worry bout bucket head
5 if u disrepect then u have to go.
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Thank you so much :freehug:
 
Apollonia said:
The commonalities between women are far more similar than not regardless of race/color/ethnicity.

I do not require that my white girlfriends prove to me how deeply something pains or bothers them before we have discussions. My role as a friend is to be a good listener and supporter. I have no need to play the 'my pain is greater than your pain' game and neither do they. And in turn my friends do not require that they experience or see what I experience as a black women in order to listen to my concerns or provide support. Not seeing something "supported" in your everyday life does NOT mean that it is not occurring.

Based upon the tone of some posts, I get the feeling that many of you feel the concept of close relationships between black and white women are a foreign concept and that we are supposed to be mortal enemies of some sort. I have never not had deep relationships with white women in my life who either family, friends, sorority sisters, teachers, mentors, etc. One of my two best friends is a white woman (and I was her maid of honor). One of my favorite aunts (married to my uncle) is a white woman and her biracial daughter (my first cousin) is like a sister to me. And one of my mentors is a white women who has moved heaven and earth for me.

Everything in life is not black and white with rigid boundaries.
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you are totally and embarrassingly delusional. No one said that ww and bw are mortal enemies and to act like there is no difference in your positions in life is completely disingenuous. Everything from jobs to how you're treated when shopping is different. If i tell a white friend I was followed in a department store and it pissed me off I doubt any of them would be ridiculous enough to say they know how it feels because quite plainly they don't and thankfully they know it. It's like a woman telling a man they had to wait for their friends to be ready so they can leave because they're afraid to walk to their car alone. Most men have absolutely no clue about that feels. So acting as if we all deal with the same exact life obstacles is phony.
You my friend are the best kind of troll the one they don't see until much later and I get to say I told you do.
SA anyone?
 
The Dark King said:
you are totally and embarrassingly delusional. No one said that ww and bw are mortal enemies and to act like there is no difference in your positions in life is completely disingenuous. Everything from jobs to how you're treated when shopping is different. If i tell a white friend I was followed in a department store and it pissed me off I doubt any of them would be ridiculous enough to say they know how it feels because quite plainly they don't and thankfully they know it. It's like a woman telling a man they had to wait for their friends to be ready so they can leave because they're afraid to walk to their car alone. Most men have absolutely no clue about that feels. So acting as if we all deal with the same exact life obstacles is phony.
You my friend are the best kind of troll the one they don't see until much later and I get to say I told you do.
SA anyone?
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this is not the suffering Olympics. Her plights do not take away form your plights. I find it narrow minded of you to react like this. Like you take it personally. I actually find your comments against Appolonia disingenuous. I find it extremely narrow minded. But I assume you will as usual not take your own advice and ignore common sense. Sometimes you are just impossible. And dont even see how hypocritical you are. You are the most stubborn, poster on here by far, failing to see your inconsistencies in your posts. Why don't you just realax and try to see things from other perspectives?

In my last post, you called it ranting, is that your response when you are called on your own mantra? If you can't live by your own advice, then stop giving it!
I love the hell out ta you but sometimes you need a love tap. On your forehead. To see how you argue against yourself.
 
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FG said:
this is not the suffering Olympics. Her plights do not take away form your plights. I find it narrow minded of you to react like this. Like you take it personally. I actually find your comments against Appolonia disingenuous. I find it extremely narrow minded. But I assume you will as usual not take your own advice and ignore common sense. Sometimes you are just impossible. And dont even see how hypocritical you are. You are the most stubborn, poster on here by far, failing to see your inconsistencies in your posts. Why don't you just realax and try to see things from other perspectives?

In my last post, you called it ranting, is that your response when you are called on your own mantra? If you can't live by your own advice, then stop giving it!
I love the hell out ta you but sometimes you need a love tap. On your forehead. To see how you argue against yourself.
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Whoa whoa you love the hell out of me? Please go on :freehug:

Again I truly don't have a problem with her in the slightest which is why I won't put her on ignore like I have done with other posters.
If she puts something out there and I disagree why am I not allowed to disagree. People disagree with me all the time and no is told to just let me be and if they don't agree just ignore me. So why is it any different here?
And you're right its not the suffering Olympics but when someone like her tries to compare what she's gone through to what bm/ww couples go through she creates that conflict. And what do you think someone is doing when they bring their supposed IR suffering to a site meant to deal with the things that affect bm and ww as couples?
Sorry if I don't cheer it on, but I am allowed to express that it's not why all of us came on this site. If the purpose of the site was to appreciate people from all walks of life then why be on a site geared towards a specific group of people. You seriously don't feel me on this at all FG?
 
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