Attraction to Black Men = Perversion?

The Dark King said:
I've gotten the same dumb questions. "Does she buy you things white girls got money" "white girls love giving head they never say no" "white girls let you get away with whatever you want you lucky" and my favorite "I guess you had a bad relationship with your mama huh"
The stupidity knows no bounds, its not ignorance it's stupidity, it's 2014 this shit ain't new ir taboo any more you just have a lot of assholes who refuse to get pas their own hang ups that they apply to everyone else.

Glad to see you posting Whik :)
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Ah yes, I forgot about the "white girls love giving head"...... Lol. Who gives you the most hard time, blacks or whites, men or women?

For me its white men and black women.
 
whikle said:
I don't want to get into the black-men-have-big-dicks debate, but I'm still sticking with that being a stereotype, not a truth.

I do agree that there are sexual double standards. But that's also not the point I'm trying to make.

When I talk about being attracted to black men, or ANY man, I'm not talking about sex or sexual attraction. Physical attraction and sexual attraction are different, in my mind. My argument is that I don't want SEX to be the main assumption when talking about attraction and preference.

I love sex, but it's only one component of attraction and relationships, and it's not the first thing on my mind when I meet someone. But maybe that's just me.
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No, it's not just you.
 
The Dark King said:
I've gotten the same dumb questions. "Does she buy you things white girls got money" "white girls love giving head they never say no" "white girls let you get away with whatever you want you lucky" and my favorite "I guess you had a bad relationship with your mama huh"
The stupidity knows no bounds, its not ignorance it's stupidity, it's 2014 this shit ain't new ir taboo any more you just have a lot of assholes who refuse to get pas their own hang ups that they apply to everyone else.

Glad to see you posting Whik :)
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That's really interesting, DK. Do those comments come from men as well as women?
 
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whikle said:
I don't want to get into the black-men-have-big-dicks debate, but I'm still sticking with that being a stereotype, not a truth.

I do agree that there are sexual double standards. But that's also not the point I'm trying to make.

When I talk about being attracted to black men, or ANY man, I'm not talking about sex or sexual attraction. Physical attraction and sexual attraction are different, in my mind. My argument is that I don't want SEX to be the main assumption when talking about attraction and preference.

I love sex, but it's only one component of attraction and relationships, and it's not the first thing on my mind when I meet someone. But maybe that's just me.
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I can see how a racial prejudice can make someone attack and make them mask it as a sexual attack, but I still honestly think that if you were a man, any color man, you'd not get these comments as often.
 
Tamstrong said:
Yeah, not everyone who comes at us with that reaction is ignorant. I was thinking more along the lines of my experiences with ignorant family members (especially my younger brothers) in that particular post...I guess my frustration with them was pretty obvious, huh? lol

I agree that on some level some people understand that the stereotype isn't the whole "truth", but I do think people tend to wonder just how much of the stereotype is involved. It's like it's so ingrained in society's thinking that people's minds automatically go there. If the day ever comes that it's not the first thing that comes to society's mind, I doubt we'll still be around to see it. I also wish it wasn't the initial reaction (especially the stupid jokes), but like I said, I've gotten used to it.
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That's exactly it. Super frustrating. But you might be right - not going to change any time soon :(
 
southfloridagirl said:
Black men age better physically. They have baby soft skin on top of rock hard muscles. They tone up better than white men. They don't wrinkle in the sun. They have deeper more masculine voices. They have sexy lips. Darker skin enhances a smile greatly. And yes, for any given height a black man is on average better-endowed than his white counterpart. In addition, black men are much more confident and secure in themselves and in how they act around me, which is HOT. Now tell me again why I should not love black men, why it is a perversion, and why a relationship cannot grow from such an attraction.... I don't see any men being ridiculed for preferring a girlfriend with equivalent feminine attributes.... nope.
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Amen! You took the words out of my mouth. There is nothing perverted about having such a strong attraction to what I see is the most gorgeous race of men on the planet. You cannot control what you find attractive. Everyone has their kind of man whom they find most desirable and white women should never be ashamed or have to explain to anyone why we want a black man. I've had to put aside some "associates" because a few of them practically accused me of being racist because I decided to pursue the men I really were attracted to and leave white men behind for good.

People well express their fear and disdain for such a beautiful combo of WW with BM because they fear something that they can't control. Whether it is people saying all black men want is a "trophy" white wife or whether they say we want black men only for their large dicks, it is all to denigrate WW and BM to make us feel guilty about our mutual attraction. It is PURE and NATURAL for some folks to have a much stronger attraction to someone of a different race. White women have nothing to prove to anyone who disapproves why we want black men; only thing that matters is that we are sincere in our desires to ourselves and the man of interest what we want out of the deal. We want the whole thing. At least the women on this board I've seen post want a good relationship with a BM which will include great action in bed as well as well as mutual respect:D
 
swirlingnurse said:
People well express their fear and disdain for such a beautiful combo of WW with BM because they fear something that they can't control. Whether it is people saying all black men want is a "trophy" white wife or whether they say we want black men only for their large dicks, it is all to denigrate WW and BM to make us feel guilty about our mutual attraction. It is PURE and NATURAL for some folks to have a much stronger attraction to someone of a different race. White women have nothing to prove to anyone who disapproves why we want black men; only thing that matters is that we are sincere in our desires to ourselves and the man of interest what we want out of the deal. We want the whole thing. At least the women on this board I've seen post want a good relationship with a BM which will include great action in bed as well as well as mutual respect:D
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Because a relationship that does not have both, is not going to last very long. Neither one is negotiable.
 
If you get in any ir relationship, people will always bring up the stereotypes for it since they can't wrap they're narrow minds around any other reason why you would date out.

If you date an asian women, people assume it's because you want a classical houswife who stays thin and lets you wear the pants in the relationship.

If you date a white man, people assume you're americanized, you're a self-hater and a gold digging whore who doesn't respect their own cultural background.

The list goes on. Now stereotypes do have a percentage of truth, because I have met and been involved with ww who date bm with nothing but sex on their minds, met a few women of color who hate being the race they are and only date white men because they dislike being people of color, and I met a few guys who like asian women because they don't fight back.

But that doesn't mean I assume all people in ir relations are in them for those reasons. If only people thought the same way.
 
southfloridagirl said:
But you are a man. You are expected to have a sexual appetite. It's ok for you to be attracted to white women. It's not ok for a white woman to be attracted to you. See the difference?

If I'm wrong, then I'd like some of the men on here to please share their experiences of being ridiculed for being attracted to white women, and if any of the comments were based on white women's sexuality. Be specific.
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But, as a man, I cannot show my sexual appetite to any woman or I would be considered a sexual predator. I don't think of sex all the time when I see an attractive woman go by, but that does not suggest that I do not have a second look. In my lifetime, two white women had stated that they would, or should have gone out with me. But, they had other issues in their lives like being engaged or getting pregnant with a guy who turns out to be a loser. My older brother and sister used to ridicule me for my interest in the IR lifestyle when I hit puberty. This did not stop me. But, because I lived in a small town in the South(Live Oak, FL), I had to keep it to myself for my mother's sake.
 
whikle said:
Woah, my bad! Edited.

You can still answer the question though please and thank you :D
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No problem just don't like giving the haters any info.
To answer your question its mostly black dudes who ask me that shit, but the do you love your mother nonsense is usually black women who would never dare ask a black woman do they love their fathers when they date someone non black. I used to get teased a lot for dating ww when I was a kid ironically several of the guys that use to make jokes about it ended up either marrying or having kids with ww. Guess they didn't mind the "wet dog smell" lol

I will say this, in my personal experience ww have been the most fun, caring, and sexual satisfying women I've dated overall. With the exception of my current gf I've usually only had eyes for ww but its not really a racial attraction as much as its associating positives with past experiences.
 
Gorath said:
But, as a man, I cannot show my sexual appetite to any woman or I would be considered a sexual predator. I don't think of sex all the time when I see an attractive woman go by, but that does not suggest that I do not have a second look. In my lifetime, two white women had stated that they would, or should have gone out with me. But, they had other issues in their lives like being engaged or getting pregnant with a guy who turns out to be a loser. My older brother and sister used to ridicule me for my interest in the IR lifestyle when I hit puberty. This did not stop me. But, because I lived in a small town in the South(Live Oak, FL), I had to keep it to myself for my mother's sake.
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Well, I do see things a little different from a woman's perspective, but honestly, when I stop think about it as thoroughly as possible, I don't know in the end, what people's deal is with WWBM IR... I guess its a mix of the sexuality of it, the raciality of it, the historical aspect of it, and the social ignorance aspect of it.... all jumbled together. People are small-minded fear-based animalistic creatures, might be the best way of putting it, without getting into specifics...
 
The Dark King said:
No problem just don't like giving the haters any info.
To answer your question its mostly black dudes who ask me that shit, but the do you love your mother nonsense is usually black women who would never dare ask a black woman do they love their fathers when they date someone non black. I used to get teased a lot for dating ww when I was a kid ironically several of the guys that use to make jokes about it ended up either marrying or having kids with ww. Guess they didn't mind the "wet dog smell" lol

I will say this, in my personal experience ww have been the most fun, caring, and sexual satisfying women I've dated overall. With the exception of my current gf I've usually only had eyes for ww but its not really a racial attraction as much as its associating positives with past experiences.
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So coming from black men, those comments are probably pretty on par with the jokes/comments I experience coming from white women. Maybe it is just a case of "fear of the unknown".
 
whikle said:
So coming from black men, those comments are probably pretty on par with the jokes/comments I experience coming from white women. Maybe it is just a case of "fear of the unknown".
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Well what I've noticed most of the black dudes who make comments really wanted to date ww but didn't think they had the "right stuff"
I went to private school and had mostly white friends growing up so to them I knew their "language" and to be fair I probably did since I spent so much of my formative years in that world.
I'd wager for a lot of ww who make jokes they are secretly curious especially sexually. What woman here doesn't swoon over having some strong muscular chocolate dude all over them long dicking them. I think nearly all women fantasize about because trust me bm aren't the ones supporting the ir porn game lol
 
The Dark King said:
Well what I've noticed most of the black dudes who make comments really wanted to date ww but didn't think they had the "right stuff"
I went to private school and had mostly white friends growing up so to them I knew their "language" and to be fair I probably did since I spent so much of my formative years in that world.
I'd wager for a lot of ww who make jokes they are secretly curious especially sexually. What woman here doesn't swoon over having some strong muscular chocolate dude all over them long dicking them. I think nearly all women fantasize about because trust me bm aren't the ones supporting the ir porn game lol
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Most of my female friends are gay ;) But there might still be a certain amount of curiosity going on there.. !
 
southfloridagirl said:
Well, I do see things a little different from a woman's perspective, but honestly, when I stop think about it as thoroughly as possible, I don't know in the end, what people's deal is with WWBM IR... I guess its a mix of the sexuality of it, the raciality of it, the historical aspect of it, and the social ignorance aspect of it.... all jumbled together. People are small-minded fear-based animalistic creatures, might be the best way of putting it, without getting into specifics...
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When you look at all the angles in regard to WW/BM in relationships other than platonic, you needn't go no farther than what is said at home among the family. There is also the fear of how such a union affects a family's standing in the community they live in. It is about fear, revulsion, ignorance, religious beliefs and history. These reasons are legitimate to those who are opposed to IR relationships other than platonic. These individuals believe that the races MUST be separated because they believe that is what God intended. I think that these people had been around these attitudes for far too long and they won't change even if it is at their own peril. That being said; a close, committed relationship has its risks because to the outside world, the question is about what they see when the see a black man and a white woman together. Do the see sexual attraction, lust and desire? Or do they see a man and a woman walking together and standing alone against the world?
 
whikle said:
Most of my female friends are gay ;) But there might still be a certain amount of curiosity going on there.. !
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hold on they're gay saying dumb shit like that? wow
Talk about lack of sensitivity. Even though I do here gay men are notoriously racist in these parts so maybe its not that much of a surprise
 
Gorath said:
When you look at all the angles in regard to WW/BM in relationships other than platonic, you needn't go no farther than what is said at home among the family. There is also the fear of how such a union affects a family's standing in the community they live in. It is about fear, revulsion, ignorance, religious beliefs and history. These reasons are legitimate to those who are opposed to IR relationships other than platonic. These individuals believe that the races MUST be separated because they believe that is what God intended. I think that these people had been around these attitudes for far too long and they won't change even if it is at their own peril. That being said; a close, committed relationship has its risks because to the outside world, the question is about what they see when the see a black man and a white woman together. Do the see sexual attraction, lust and desire? Or do they see a man and a woman walking together and standing alone against the world?
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Yes, and then there are the religion based dumbasses, who use the Bible to back up all of their bs, despite the fact most of them have not even read the Bible.

Any relationship has its risks. Especially when the people in it actually care what the outside world sees and says.... But you have a valid point, if the people are ambitious to fit into their society and community, an IR is probably not recommended, lol. But two people who have such an orientation are also a sign of a doomed relationship. Because the outside world will find any and all angles to tear down something they want to see fail. And I am saying this from the experience of being previously married - to a white man. Race not even a factor there.
 
The Dark King said:
hold on they're gay saying dumb shit like that? wow
Talk about lack of sensitivity. Even though I do here gay men are notoriously racist in these parts so maybe its not that much of a surprise
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Gay, straight, it doesn't make any difference, the stereotype about black men is the same.
 
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