Happy Birthday Orejon!

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:freehug:
 
orejon4 said:
THANKS EVERYONE! Now I'm off to celebrate it at the library, lol. Need to get out of the house anyway, because the heat from all these candles is giving me a hot flash, lol.
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My crystal ball says that down the road, those hours of study in the library will some day pay handsome dividends.....

HappyBirthday Sir

 
Thanks, all! Twas not to be that happy, alas, as the ex found a way to irritate as only she does. The sordid tale is as follows:

The USTA tennis association in SW Florida wants to consider a ban of my son's mother from tournaments for disrespectful behavior toward another child and violating rules over the weekend. The coach called about it Monday morning. She insulted Junior's opponent accusing him of cheating, and he's the child of a major Circuit Court Judge down there. The coach left during his match out of embarrassment. He and I were going to write a letter to the judge apologizing, but the coach has been playing against him since age 13, so he reached out to him personally and said to let him handle it. Apparently she was yelling at the kid through the fence and then the USTA official came over to remind her of the rules and to quiet down and she got into it with her.

The regional tennis officials have received complaints about her. So after his match against the Sanchez Vicario child she called us and put her spin on it: the kid was cheating, the USTA official was cheating, etc. She did that to put her spin on it before we got word from the coach. The coach is saying he cannot have her affiliated with his academy and will not coach my son at tournaments if she is present.

She says it's everyone else, everyone else says it's her. You know the old phrase: everyone can't be wrong. And berating a child is wholly unacceptable. If you have an issue bring it up with an official.
She has prevented my stepfather and I from speaking to my son because she says he's "too angry to talk" and that he is quitting tennis. I checked with my attorney this morning and I have tennis included in his recreational activity section of the parenting plan, so she cannot unilaterally remove him.

I should have been expecting it. There's at least one row between her and an adult authority figure in my son's life every school year. The coach is going to try to work something out this afternoon. He has 5 tournaments with me without incident this summer and his first one with her and boom. And not a minor thing, but an altercation with other adults. I would expect foolishness from kids, but not a 40year old.

Postscript: She is now sending out e-mails to my stepfather and the coach saying that she has 'calmed my son down' and convinced him to remain in the program. Trust me, for those forum members complaining about a former relationship, believe me, having one you want to be rid of who continually makes problems is far worse.
 
orejon4 said:
Thanks, all! Twas not to be that happy, alas, as the ex found a way to irritate as only she does. The sordid tale is as follows:

The USTA tennis association in SW Florida wants to consider a ban of my son's mother from tournaments for disrespectful behavior toward another child and violating rules over the weekend. The coach called about it Monday morning. She insulted Junior's opponent accusing him of cheating, and he's the child of a major Circuit Court Judge down there. The coach left during his match out of embarrassment. He and I were going to write a letter to the judge apologizing, but the coach has been playing against him since age 13, so he reached out to him personally and said to let him handle it. Apparently she was yelling at the kid through the fence and then the USTA official came over to remind her of the rules and to quiet down and she got into it with her.

The regional tennis officials have received complaints about her. So after his match against the Sanchez Vicario child she called us and put her spin on it: the kid was cheating, the USTA official was cheating, etc. She did that to put her spin on it before we got word from the coach. The coach is saying he cannot have her affiliated with his academy and will not coach my son at tournaments if she is present.

She says it's everyone else, everyone else says it's her. You know the old phrase: everyone can't be wrong. And berating a child is wholly unacceptable. If you have an issue bring it up with an official.
She has prevented my stepfather and I from speaking to my son because she says he's "too angry to talk" and that he is quitting tennis. I checked with my attorney this morning and I have tennis included in his recreational activity section of the parenting plan, so she cannot unilaterally remove him.

I should have been expecting it. There's at least one row between her and an adult authority figure in my son's life every school year. The coach is going to try to work something out this afternoon. He has 5 tournaments with me without incident this summer and his first one with her and boom. And not a minor thing, but an altercation with other adults. I would expect foolishness from kids, but not a 40year old.

Postscript: She is now sending out e-mails to my stepfather and the coach saying that she has 'calmed my son down' and convinced him to remain in the program. Trust me, for those forum members complaining about a former relationship, believe me, having one you want to be rid of who continually makes problems is far worse.
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Your son is lucky to have you for a father. He will grow up and see for himself what kind of person/parent each of his parents are. You need not say a negative word about your ex for he will discover the truth on his own. I speak from experience. You cannot control another person's actions. Only your own. Continue to be the caring, loving, mature parent that you are, and I'm sure you will celebrate many happy birthdays with your son in the future.
 
orejon4 said:
Thanks, all! Twas not to be that happy, alas, as the ex found a way to irritate as only she does. The sordid tale is as follows:

The USTA tennis association in SW Florida wants to consider a ban of my son's mother from tournaments for disrespectful behavior toward another child and violating rules over the weekend. The coach called about it Monday morning. She insulted Junior's opponent accusing him of cheating, and he's the child of a major Circuit Court Judge down there. The coach left during his match out of embarrassment. He and I were going to write a letter to the judge apologizing, but the coach has been playing against him since age 13, so he reached out to him personally and said to let him handle it. Apparently she was yelling at the kid through the fence and then the USTA official came over to remind her of the rules and to quiet down and she got into it with her.

The regional tennis officials have received complaints about her. So after his match against the Sanchez Vicario child she called us and put her spin on it: the kid was cheating, the USTA official was cheating, etc. She did that to put her spin on it before we got word from the coach. The coach is saying he cannot have her affiliated with his academy and will not coach my son at tournaments if she is present.

She says it's everyone else, everyone else says it's her. You know the old phrase: everyone can't be wrong. And berating a child is wholly unacceptable. If you have an issue bring it up with an official.
She has prevented my stepfather and I from speaking to my son because she says he's "too angry to talk" and that he is quitting tennis. I checked with my attorney this morning and I have tennis included in his recreational activity section of the parenting plan, so she cannot unilaterally remove him.

I should have been expecting it. There's at least one row between her and an adult authority figure in my son's life every school year. The coach is going to try to work something out this afternoon. He has 5 tournaments with me without incident this summer and his first one with her and boom. And not a minor thing, but an altercation with other adults. I would expect foolishness from kids, but not a 40year old.

Postscript: She is now sending out e-mails to my stepfather and the coach saying that she has 'calmed my son down' and convinced him to remain in the program. Trust me, for those forum members complaining about a former relationship, believe me, having one you want to be rid of who continually makes problems is far worse.
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you are in for the long haul on this one until your son turns 18+ your son can still play tennis without her...you are a smart man and if there is a will there is a way,,,i really want to know how she can keep him from talking to you...that would really piss me off:mad:
 
RestlessRita said:
Your son is lucky to have you for a father. He will grow up and see for himself what kind of person/parent each of his parents are. You need not say a negative word about your ex for he will discover the truth on his own. I speak from experience. You cannot control another person's actions. Only your own. Continue to be the caring, loving, mature parent that you are, and I'm sure you will celebrate many happy birthdays with your son in the future.
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Thanks RestlessRita! I never utter her name, because I don't want their interactions to be affected by me. As I have told her on more than one occasion, "your relationship with our son is your responsibility; my relationship with him is mine".

lippy said:
you are in for the long haul on this one until your son turns 18+ your son can still play tennis without her...you are a smart man and if there is a will there is a way,,,i really want to know how she can keep him from talking to you...that would really piss me off:mad:
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Well, she just takes the telephone I bought for him when he's not paying attention and takes it from him and hides it or shuts it off. He's only 11, so like most kids, out of sight, out of mind. As for playing the sport, I have the tennis program written into the child custody agreement as a condition since I'm the one who pays for it.
 
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