How to make my erotic interest clear(er)?

BeigeForWhite said:
Hey folks:
Recently, I met a young woman at my local Alliance Française, in Minneapolis. We had a pleasant conversation, during which she distinguished herself by charming me.

She wasn't wearing a ring on the marriage finger, so I figured I'd go for it. I have heard that you need to approach white women differently, but games don't interest me. When I asked how to contact her, she wrote down her email address and phone number. These were positive signs.

A few days later, I left her a voice mail saying that I'd like to take her out to a film, using those traditional words. She called me back a few days ago, and suggested that we meet for coffee without mentioning the film. I agreed.

Today we met. About 20-minutes into a pleasant conversation, she mentioned her boyfriend in France, non-chalantly. She has been seeing him for two years. When I probed her a little bit about that, she said that she has a bad radar in terms of understanding when a man is asking her out.

This isn't the first time that I've faced a woman with a faulty radar.

I was confident that I had met one of the few tall, thin, pretty somewhat lady-like women who speaks French. And then she shows me a page from the book of crazy.

I want to make it clear to the woman, no matter her color or background, that a romantic and erotic partner interests me, not merely a woman friend.

Has someone already created a thread for this? If so, then please provide me with the link.
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Here is my take on the situation.

Honestly asking someone for coffee/movie is pretty direct. Honestly she is just socially awkward if she did not understand. But hey keep her as a friend she might have a pretty friend who is single that she can introduce you to.

Though you should also stop focusing on what you are doing, and focus on the women, and her body language. Is she showing that she is interested in you by her body language, and actions?

Or if you want to be really direct....

Just start touching them, and see how they react to it. (Assuming you have already have had a conversation/met them already.) Lets just say you will definitely send the message you are interested.
 
BeigeForWhite said:
Hey folks:
Recently, I met a young woman at my local Alliance Française, in Minneapolis. We had a pleasant conversation, during which she distinguished herself by charming me.

She wasn't wearing a ring on the marriage finger, so I figured I'd go for it. I have heard that you need to approach white women differently, but games don't interest me. When I asked how to contact her, she wrote down her email address and phone number. These were positive signs.

A few days later, I left her a voice mail saying that I'd like to take her out to a film, using those traditional words. She called me back a few days ago, and suggested that we meet for coffee without mentioning the film. I agreed.

Today we met. About 20-minutes into a pleasant conversation, she mentioned her boyfriend in France, non-chalantly. She has been seeing him for two years. When I probed her a little bit about that, she said that she has a bad radar in terms of understanding when a man is asking her out.

This isn't the first time that I've faced a woman with a faulty radar.

I was confident that I had met one of the few tall, thin, pretty somewhat lady-like women who speaks French. And then she shows me a page from the book of crazy.

I want to make it clear to the woman, no matter her color or background, that a romantic and erotic partner interests me, not merely a woman friend.

Has someone already created a thread for this? If so, then please provide me with the link.
Click to expand...

Hi, there, BFW, in my opinion, you need to be honest from the start. Eye contact is essential. If a woman responds to your conversing with her, then after a couple of minutes of general conversation, simply say you are glad to have met her and you are wondering if she were single. Let her know you would be interested in getting to know each other better. I believe you will get your answer soon enough.
 
MixedCalifornian said:
Here is my take on the situation.

Honestly asking someone for coffee/movie is pretty direct. Honestly she is just socially awkward if she did not understand. But hey keep her as a friend she might have a pretty friend who is single that she can introduce you to.

Though you should also stop focusing on what you are doing, and focus on the women, and her body language. Is she showing that she is interested in you by her body language, and actions?

Or if you want to be really direct....

Just start touching them, and see how they react to it. (Assuming you have already have had a conversation/met them already.) Lets just say you will definitely send the message you are interested.
Click to expand...

Dear Mixed:

Thank you for your earnest and sympathetic advice.

I did not know what to think or how to respond when she said that, as intelligent as she seemed, she couldn't tell when a man was interested; that was a new and strange one for me.
 
RestlessRita said:
Hi, there, BFW, in my opinion, you need to be honest from the start. Eye contact is essential. If a woman responds to your conversing with her, then after a couple of minutes of general conversation, simply say you are glad to have met her and you are wondering if she were single. Let her know you would be interested in getting to know each other better. I believe you will get your answer soon enough.
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Hello Restless:

Thank you for your earnest affirmation. (I have some destructive self-talk that I need to kill, still...) I need to "get out there" more often, practice this, and improve my habits and success rate!
 
BeigeForWhite said:
Dear Mixed:

Thank you for your earnest and sympathetic advice.

I did not know what to think or how to respond when she said that, as intelligent as she seemed, she couldn't tell when a man was interested; that was a new and strange one for me.
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Hard to believe, but there are a lot of women so shy, and socially awkward that they are kept single. There are also naive girls that are sheltered, and think "Oh everyones just friendly to me for no reason, but to be nice."

I also consider it socially awkward to have unrealistic, and unreasonable standards, and expectations.
 
buglerroller said:
its all in your approach, for starters make her laugh then hand her your phone and tell her to put her number in it. simple!
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fantasyfangrl said:
It works. I had a guy do that to me tonight and ... well, it definitely works lets put it that way. :smt112
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Yes it works! Worked for a guy I met Fri morning on my way to work ;)

If a guy talks to me, makes me laugh, and there's a mutual attraction...that line will always work (doesn't hurt that he showed me his Raider tattoo :)).
 
RaiderLL said:
Yes it works! Worked for a guy I met Fri morning on my way to work ;)

If a guy talks to me, makes me laugh, and there's a mutual attraction...that line will always work (doesn't hurt that he showed me his Raider tattoo :)).
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Too true! Confidence doesn't hurt either. Coming up to a woman with confidence (not arrogance) instantly catches her attention.
 
MixedCalifornian said:
Honestly asking someone for coffee/movie is pretty direct.
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I agree with that entirely. I've never met a woman who didn't know when a guy was hitting on her, especially when was as direct as BFW. Speaking for myself, I'm not a player and I never have been but if I approach a woman it's because I'm approaching her with more than friendship in mind.
 
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