Never Satisfied why Nerdy black men can't find happiness

mikesandy said:
To your first paragraph, I am a great athlete, but not correct by the standards by the black community. The sports that are represented and acknowledged most by the black community are Football and Basketball. The BW express interest for BM that have involvement in particularly those kinds of sports. Track would come behind that, and the main focus is on the Sprinters, within track & field. However, I'm unable to fit in, because I'm a long distance runner. The only people that participate in that sport (predominantly) are white guys and white girls.
Click to expand...

I don't know how healthy my lungs are, but I think I could do something with track and field. I started to lose love for the NBA with ball hogs and certain teams (The Sacramento Kings lost the possibility to win the champs twice and I was pissed).

To your second point, I'm glad you think that money definitely isn't the make-or-break thing for yourself and the relationship. In my opinion, the economic resiliency of the area you live in is a more important factor for me.
Click to expand...

Yeah, I agree there as well. Money is important, but I think personality is key, then a woman might look at financial issues.

You may even be confronted and someone may ask you "How did you end up hooking up with that gorgeous white girl even though your black?"
Click to expand...

That is a matter that will have to play itself out. I think there will be a day where brothers like ourselves that feel marginalized by the community will have the leaders that will inspire confident, educated men to go after what they want. And if it happens to be that white women are on the list (for the right reasons), then by all means, I'm gonna say "I wanted this woman because she's beautiful on the outside, on the inside, she's ambitious, she's clean, she cooks for me, she has good conversation, she's funny, and she exhausts my sexual appetite." :smt095

To your last thing you mentioned, I have the same problem. There is a lack of sexual drive/sexual energy that powers up when I see BW. Sometimes, when I see WW, the power up occurs and your gut instincts tell you to initiate a conversation with her. So it's not that I'm hating on BW or bashing BW, the energy and sexual appeal just isn't there.
Click to expand...

The woman I could end up with could be white, black, even Japanese. It all depends on where my life's journey takes me.
 
Hellspawn said:
I don't know how healthy my lungs are, but I think I could do something with track and field. I started to lose love for the NBA with ball hogs and certain teams (The Sacramento Kings lost the possibility to win the champs twice and I was pissed).

Yeah, I agree there as well. Money is important, but I think personality is key, then a woman might look at financial issues.

That is a matter that will have to play itself out. I think there will be a day where brothers like ourselves that feel marginalized by the community will have the leaders that will inspire confident, educated men to go after what they want. And if it happens to be that white women are on the list (for the right reasons), then by all means, I'm gonna say "I wanted this woman because she's beautiful on the outside, on the inside, she's ambitious, she's clean, she cooks for me, she has good conversation, she's funny, and she exhausts my sexual appetite." :smt095

The woman I could end up with could be white, black, even Japanese. It all depends on where my life's journey takes me.
Click to expand...
Good luck with all that. I know we're on the right path for better endeavors and opportunities. As long as your educated, have a view of what is going on in the world, and you're respectful/cordial towards other men and women, you should be fine. Honestly, I'm a pretty laid back, chill, friendly guy. I can be childish and emotional over things at times, but other than that, I don't view myself as a person who carries negative weight with him. In this world, we won't get along with every person you meet, but it's good to make sure you're very respectful, cordial, and caring of yourself and your peers.
 
^
If you judge girls on their looks, you can't really complain when they judge you on yours :P I know it's a jokey thing, but I don't think anyone's surprised when the prettiest girl in school dates the best looking guy.

article said:
they were not my type. If I had a choice between one of these individuals and being single I would choose the latter. An anti-social individual is a TURN OFF.
Click to expand...
At this point I yawned and stopped reading. She's not talking about nerds, she's talking about men with no social skills and stereotyping twice(them as nerds and nerds as them). You can be geeky/nerdy and have good social skills and you can have zero social skills and not be.

Honestly, I'm more concerned with her poor writing skills! Aside from the nerd/lack of social skills issue, anti-social doesn't mean what she thinks it means(honestly, if you don't know the meaning of a word or phrase, it's a few seconds work to google it). Throughout the article she means men lacking in social skills yet refers to nerds and anti-social men and even takes a stab at looks. I honestly wouldn't give her opinions two seconds of consideration as she clearly has no idea what she's talking about, anyone can stick up a few bitchy blog posts, but anyone with sense would make sure they weren't highlighting their own ignorance before publishing them.

That said, if you want to get girls, then yes, you should work on your social skills. The article is a bag of crap, but social skills are important in human interaction in general and vital in relationships. If you struggle with it(and a lot of people do), there is much information online, etc. that can help, along with observing the behaviour of others, etc. It's not something that comes naturally to everyone, but it is possible to learn.
 
Its so fukkin stupid. Nerdiness is relative, it has nothing to do with whatever the the OP make it to be. Women, regardless of color has different views of nerdiness and different view of what a suitable mate is. Its all relative... I take a nerd any day if there is chemistry. Way better than a thug/bad boy.
 
Really what I think it is, is that if you wear glasses, you're basically a nerd. I wear them (but not permanently) only for driving and using the computer. That's the common stereotype within society. Because Americans can be judgmental and critical of your image, especially with how you dress and who you are around in public.
 
If this is not the most unintelligible article I've ever read in my entire. I'm one of those black nerds and I can safely say that she horribly stereotyped the shit out of people she either NEVER encountered, but judged based on TV shows OR she's upset because the nerd she disregarded is now with a woman (perhaps white) and the guy simply don't remember her period and wish to forget the past and move on. I personally don't have a unit of people whom I'd associate with, but I'm a far-cry from being someone who really have no friends - and we're talking specifically outside of the internet.

I'll admit that I'm not someone who can really attract women due to me being incredibly different or unique in a sexual sense, but at the same time I can and my recent encounters are good examples of it. Sex appeal without having to adjust to someone else's perspective on how to dress proves her wrong. You all know how I dress. Not nerdy, but more akin to someone who likes to be presentable.

Also, I wish to address that this Alpha-Male thing sort of had its due. Yes, the tough guy persona is still pretty much a necessity, but who to say that exercising it in one way is the only way? If anything, someone who can easily be a nerd and not look tough can still exercise toughness with intelligence through subtle manipulations. That there is a strong suit or quality.

It's baffling when someone like "Von" write articles like this because she has this messed up complex. And I think that attitude sort of dipped for the majority because we all age and wise up in the end.
 
King Fox said:
That nerd would probably know a thing or two about chemistry too.

*cough*

lol
Click to expand...

True, true - LOL - but since I know a thing or two about chemistry, I guess I think that would be hot! After all, The G in FG stands for geek!
:cool:
 
Xboxgirl said:
^
If you judge girls on their looks, you can't really complain when they judge you on yours :P I know it's a jokey thing, but I don't think anyone's surprised when the prettiest girl in school dates the best looking guy.


At this point I yawned and stopped reading. She's not talking about nerds, she's talking about men with no social skills and stereotyping twice(them as nerds and nerds as them). You can be geeky/nerdy and have good social skills and you can have zero social skills and not be.

Honestly, I'm more concerned with her poor writing skills! Aside from the nerd/lack of social skills issue, anti-social doesn't mean what she thinks it means(honestly, if you don't know the meaning of a word or phrase, it's a few seconds work to google it). Throughout the article she means men lacking in social skills yet refers to nerds and anti-social men and even takes a stab at looks. I honestly wouldn't give her opinions two seconds of consideration as she clearly has no idea what she's talking about, anyone can stick up a few bitchy blog posts, but anyone with sense would make sure they weren't highlighting their own ignorance before publishing them.

That said, if you want to get girls, then yes, you should work on your social skills. The article is a bag of crap, but social skills are important in human interaction in general and vital in relationships. If you struggle with it(and a lot of people do), there is much information online, etc. that can help, along with observing the behaviour of others, etc. It's not something that comes naturally to everyone, but it is possible to learn.
Click to expand...

FG said:
Its so fukkin stupid. Nerdiness is relative, it has nothing to do with whatever the the OP make it to be. Women, regardless of color has different views of nerdiness and different view of what a suitable mate is. Its all relative... I take a nerd any day if there is chemistry. Way better than a thug/bad boy.
Click to expand...

goodlove said:
I dont think it uncool to be a nerd....Its uncool to not have confidence in yourself. the classic people to talk about are Obama and cornell west (he has been married several times

lets face it Obama and cornel are intellectuals . Obama's wife is good looking so you can pull a fine ass woman if you have a good mouth piece and walk with confidence and dress good and lastly manage your money. they dont really care if you have a nerdy job.
Click to expand...

nerds can easily clean up....like you guys stated. It takes trial and error and self awareness (honesty about your fuck ups) to get your social skills going. the most important thing is confidence (not being afraid in getting rejected...its going to happen. not being afraid to say lets hook up...its going to happen that they are going to say no.) its not what you say its how you say it
 
It seems like whenever a black person doesn't fit in what the "criteria" is for being black other black folks put them down for it and say that they are acting white. This video is an example of it:

[youtube]glOv4MIyNSE[/youtube]
 
Nerd in the Hood

What a funny article. I don't take her serious at all. I am a nerd, and proud of it. I was a nerd in the hood. Being a nerd literally saved my life. My love for books kept me out the streets. Unfortunately, at 35, I have outlived a slew of friends.
 
ThePrince said:
It seems like whenever a black person doesn't fit in what the "criteria" is for being black other black folks put them down for it and say that they are acting white. This video is an example of it:

[youtube]glOv4MIyNSE[/youtube]
Click to expand...

So sad yet so fucking true. We're the only ones who want to penialize someone for progressing. I guess the crabs in a barrel theory ain't a theory is it.
 
Do I think black nerds can find happiness? Hell yeah they can but first they have to find out what makes them happy. For some reason people believe this factoid that love equals happiness. The truth is happiness comes from within. If look at yourself and don't know who are and what you are you will never be happy. If you get up everyday and go to work and don't like what you're doing you will never be happy. A woman will never make a man happy if he's not happy with himself and I don't care how fine she is.

Now can a nerdy black man get a fine ass woman? Hell yeah they can, but first they need to get some money. If a man has money no matter disgusting or retarded he might he will always be able to get any type of woman he wants. He might not be able to get any woman he wants but he will be able to get any type of woman he wants.
 
As a self-described 'nerd' I'm happy as hell. I don't need the validation of others to feel 'cool'. And besides, cool is overrated anyway. I think once a person finds their own peace and satisfaction with themselves, it flows from there. Now if you don't mind, I'm off to watch 'Return of the King' extended Director's Cut for the umpteenth time! LOL!
 
orejon4 said:
As a self-described 'nerd' I'm happy as hell. I don't need the validation of others to feel 'cool'. And besides, cool is overrated anyway. I think once a person finds their own peace and satisfaction with themselves, it flows from there. Now if you don't mind, I'm off to watch 'Return of the King' extended Director's Cut for the umpteenth time! LOL!
Click to expand...

Your average "cool" guy ends up with bad credit and some stds and unwanted baby mama drama. Google it.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom