Random Conversation 2.0

christine dubois said:
I was thinking a friend of mine is a friend- the result is that she only came into my life with the will to destroy me. She followed an insidious plan and entered into partnership with a person that is "nicely said" a bastard.

I kicked him out a few months ago, now her. I know that she will regret her intention deeply, but I wish her nothing else than a burning hell on earth. Am I wrong?
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You're angry, you feel betrayed, you're hurt and you want to hurt back. Those emotions are normal in the aftermath of such a betrayal. (I'm sorry you are going through such a thing.) The thing is, if you allow those emotions to control you or to fester within, you will become bitter and only end up destroying yourself.

The only healthy thing, imo, is to work towards forgiveness, no.matter how hard because it will benefit you in the end. Forgiveness means you let go of the need to exact revenge or mete out justice. It doesn't mean you can't be angry or feel hurt and it doesn't mean you need to act like this didn't happen.

I was in a situation where I was deeply betrayed by someone very dear to me. It took me years to work through that pain, but the day I could finally say "I forgive you" and mean it was the day I finally found freedom. (It was so bad I had nightmares about this person. They ended immediately.)
 
chesbaygrl7 said:
You're angry, you feel betrayed, you're hurt and you want to hurt back. Those emotions are normal in the aftermath of such a betrayal. (I'm sorry you are going through such a thing.) The thing is, if you allow those emotions to control you or to fester within, you will become bitter and only end up destroying yourself.

The only healthy thing, imo, is to work towards forgiveness, no.matter how hard because it will benefit you in the end. Forgiveness means you let go of the need to exact revenge or mete out justice. It doesn't mean you can't be angry or feel hurt and it doesn't mean you need to act like this didn't happen.

I was in a situation where I was deeply betrayed by someone very dear to me. It took me years to work through that pain, but the day I could finally say "I forgive you" and mean it was the day I finally found freedom. (It was so bad I had nightmares about this person. They ended immediately.)
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Thank you ches for your reply, I appreciated it very much. You know, she is (luckily) not in my mind, my experience with people tell me (mostly), who is fake and who not. I know that she is running into her misery, because she isn't able to handle with that man. He is definitly a psychopath (it took all my nerves to ban him from my life, I even needed people in my house), so I don't need to do anything, he will solve all out for her, sooner or later.

I am just afraid that these kind of thoughts will come back to me. Many times I've made the experience that if you wish someone something bad, it comes back to you sooner than you can imagine. So my question is more exactly, do I have the right to wish her, what I never want to experience?

I am mixed in my feelings, because my mind tells me that I am right, she wanted to spy and to destroy me, but shouldn't I be a better person than she is?
 
Absolutely. Because at the end of the day, you have to look at yourself in the mirror and like the person you see reflected there. Wishing bad things for her is like wanting to mete out justice in your own way. But as you indicated, she will get her just desserts. When those thoughts come, don't entertain them. Take the high road, even if only in your mind. Being angry at her (or him) won't really hurt them but it can destroy you. Is it worth it?

I know you will do the right thing...:)


christine dubois said:
Thank you ches for your reply, I appreciated it very much. You know, she is (luckily) not in my mind, my experience with people tell me (mostly), who is fake and who not. I know that she is running into her misery, because she isn't able to handle with that man. He is definitly a psychopath (it took all my nerves to ban him from my life, I even needed people in my house), so I don't need to do anything, he will solve all out for her, sooner or later.

I am just afraid that these kind of thoughts will come back to me. Many times I've made the experience that if you wish someone something bad, it comes back to you sooner than you can imagine. So my question is more exactly, do I have the right to wish her, what I never want to experience?

I am mixed in my feelings, because my mind tells me that I am right, she wanted to spy and to destroy me, but shouldn't I be a better person than she is?
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chesbaygrl7 said:
Absolutely. Because at the end of the day, you have to look at yourself in the mirror and like the person you see reflected there. Wishing bad things for her is like wanting to mete out justice in your own way. But as you indicated, she will get her just desserts. When those thoughts come, don't entertain them. Take the high road, even if only in your mind. Being angry at her (or him) won't really hurt them but it can destroy you. Is it worth it?

I know you will do the right thing...:)
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Thanks chess..you are a great advicer..I know now, how to handle it..Thanks!:D
 
christine dubois said:
Thanks chess..you are a great advicer..I know now, how to handle it..Thanks!:D
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Thanks, Christine. I think I have a bit of a grasp on the woman you are from your posts here, and I think any action other than taking the high road would clash with that woman. Hope that makes sense. Much love to you.
 
chesbaygrl7 said:
Thanks, Christine. I think I have a bit of a grasp on the woman you are from your posts here, and I think any action other than taking the high road would clash with that woman. Hope that makes sense. Much love to you.
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lol..you know, I always try to be fair, rational..but sometimes the wild animal shows up..sometimes it's appreciated, necessarily, but sometimes you just have to give it a slap in the face and to remember ( if you are lucky by help of a friend like chess) that this is the difference between all of us human beings. The development of ourselves and the mastery of our bad instincts.
 
christine dubois said:
lol..you know, I always try to be fair, rational..but sometimes the wild animal shows up..sometimes it's appreciated, necessarily, but sometimes you just have to give it a slap in the face and to remember ( if you are lucky by help of a friend like chess) that this is the difference between all of us human beings. The development of ourselves and the mastery of our bad instincts.
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This. :smt023
 
Damn, that's horrible. Not washing your hands after using the bathroom is grounds for execution.

BACU said:
So I'm shaving this morning and my roommate uses the restroom, flushes the toilet and goes straight to the fridge. I'm thinkin' "dude, seriously. What the fuck?" There's another sink in the kitchen. Use it. I'm surprised he even flushed the toilet, since h never does that either. Thought I was done dealing with filthy shit like that in basic.
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Soooo, watching "The Exes" and can't say I like the show but I LOVE Donald Faison! Oh my - can't get enough of Turk! :smt050
 
LA said:
:smt038


Now... the question is... how many units did you take during the fall semester?? :)
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18 credits
Cult Anth Lab- 4.0
Cult Anth lec- 3.7
Arch lab- 4.0
Arch lec- 3.7
Anth teach meth- 4.0
arth 101- 3.3
and
europe since 1815- 3.7

plus i worked
plus i was the publicist for one of my clubs
plus i was an assistant editor for the collegiate anthropologist
 
jaisee said:
Cause it's a stupid ass holiday unless you have kids to waste your hard earned money buying useless shit for, at which point it becomes a stupid ass expensive ass holiday.
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Did somebody get out of the wrong side of the bed today?! Lol! :smt111
 
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